Microwave Massacre

Director - Wayne Berwick (The Naked Monster)
Starring - Jackie Vernon (Kolchak: The Night Stalker, Frosty's Winter Wonderland), Loren Schein, and Al Troupe (Feast, L.A. Heat)
Release Date - 1983
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "They came for dinner...to find out they were it"
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     

When I was in middle school I started collecting hardcore.  Anytime I could visit a flea market, yard sale, or store I would immediately hit the movie section.  Hell, I still do that but for a different format.  Back when I was hunting for VHS there was several tapes I really wanted.  Goremet, Zombie Chef from Hell, Frankenhooker with the light up box, Abomination, and Microwave Massacre were the that that I remember actively searching for.  I found these films at several horror cons but they were actually DVD boots and not the real VHS.  I gave up looking for them when I gave up collecting VHS but recently got excited again when Arrow announced that they would be releasing Microwave Massacre film on blu.  I reached out to MVD, who was releasing the film in the U.S., and they were kind enough to send a copy my way.  Thanks guys!
The film follows blue collar construction worker Donald (Vernon) who misses his lunch before his wife tried spicing things up with her new industrial microwave.   She is making exotic dishes that he is not too fond of.  He misses his old lunches which usually consisted of some sort of deli meat and bread but his wife refuses to listen to him.  One day after a hard day at work she screws up one of her outrages meals and then verbally abuses Donald.  He had a little too much to drink and kills her in a fit of rage.  He awakens the next morning as if nothing had happened but with a new dish for lunch.  He slowly remembers what happened and how he turned part of his wife into his new meal.   That sparks a killing spree where he would lure women back to his place where he fucks them and then kills them for his food source where he prepares them in his wife's microwave.
     I knew Microwave Massacre would be fun.  Hell, how could a cannibal flick based around a microwave not be fun?  I knew the film would be cheesy and campy but I had no idea I would like it as much as I did.  The acting in this one is not that great.  It was fair but that was about it.  Vernon was great as Donald and gave the film a lot of personalty but the remainder of the film's cast and characters did not fit with Donald's character.  His was fun and over the top while the rest of the characters were flat and very one dimensional.  The cast is solid for the most part but they do not get the option to show off their skills the same as Vernon.  The story for this one is fun but reminds me a lot of the other suburban cannibal flicks.  Considering the release date of this one I can only assume that it is one of the firsts to inspire others like it including Auntie Lee's Meat Pies and Rabid Grannies.  The story is fun but does have a hard time filling in the film's running time.  Some of the scenes are rather boring and could have been cut to make the film flow a lot better.  Finally, the film has a few deaths that are mostly Donald choking out his female victims.  There is a few weak dismemberment scenes that use every trick in the book.  Back in the 40s this would have been fun but now, and considering the type of film it is, it does not work that well.  Overall, Microwave Massacre is a film that is far from perfect but has that late night viewing charm.  This is the type of movie that looks great on blu from Arrow but would have been just as enjoyable if you watched it on VHS.  If you want cheese with your horror then this is one you may want to check out.

Cannibal Claus

Director - Sean Donohue (Death-Scort Service)
Starring - Bob Glazier (Slasher Weekend), Alberto Giovannelli (The Carnage Collection), and Mady Giovannelli
Release Date - 2016
Genre - Horror
Tagline  "You're only as good as you taste"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I absolutely love Halloween and anything associated with it.  The candy, the costumes, the decorations, and of course all the horror movies. I would be lying if I said Halloween is my favorite holiday because it isn't.  Christmas is by far my favorite holiday.  As soon as it hits December I turn into Clark Griswold.  I string up lights, blow molds, inflatables, and so on to the point it looks like Target's holiday section exploded in my yard.  I just love Christmas.  Well, I love Xmas since I'm not religious.  Anyway, I love Christmas and I love Christmas horror.  Sadly, we don't get a lot of new Christmas themed horror films.   A few years back saw the release of Caesar and Otto's Deadly Xmas and last year saw Dismembering Christmas.  With the exception of the unwatchable Krampus films we hardly get Christmas horror.  Cue in Sean Donohue and his new film Cannibal Claus.  This Bob Glazier led flick was one we were surprised with when Sean announced its completion with little to no announcement that he was actually making the film.  When the film was completed Sean reached out to me with a review copy.  Once again, thank you Sean for allowing Horror Society and myself the opportunity to see your new film.
     The film follows mall Santa Nick Cringle (Glazier) who is let go from his job after five years of service.  He does not take the news very well and breaks down on his former employer before leaving.  Nick is now a changed man.  His dark past has come back to haunt him and the torment of his youth gets the best of him which sends him on a killing spree.  He starts breaking into homes where he kills and rapes, usually in that order, before cutting up the bodies into small pieces to place in his fridge or to cook while making his way through his own naughty list.

     I really enjoy these Gatorblade Films and Sleaze Box collaborations.  When these two come together you know you are about to watch a movie full of sex, debauchery, and bloodshed.  Death-Scort Service set the pace and Chaos A.D. raised the bar.  Where would Cannibal Claus land in the middle of all the carnage?  The acting for this one is solid.  Bob Glazier is one hell of an actor.  He looks like your stereotypical grandfather.  You can tell deep down he is a loving man who holds his friends and family in high regards but when the camera starts rolling he is a different beast altogether.  In almost every film I have seen him in where he plays a killer or a maniac he winds up making my skin crawl.  He is a true psycho when the camera is rolling.  Another performance that I really enjoyed was from Alberto Giovannelli.  I am unfamiliar with this young man but his character was funny in a sense but creepy as hell.  His laugh scene made me belly laugh but it was still creepy to watch.  His scenes, which are done in flashback segments, also included Mady and Lucio Giovannelli who I assume is his family.  They all did great and made the scenes even more creepier.  Now, on to the ladies of Cannibal Claus.  I don't know what they put in the water in Florida but they know how to make beautiful women.  We see several familiar faces like Krystal Adams, Cayt Feinics, Ashley Caputo, Paula Tsurara, and one of my new favorites Racheal Shaw.   They are all sexy, provocative, and know how to steal a scene. The story for this one is one we have seen before but not that many times.  Killer Santa flicks are what we usually get for Halloween horror but we never get cannibal Santa flicks.  This was fun but some of the scenes were just a little too long or tried the viewer's patience.  A little trimming would have went a long way.  Finally, the film has tons of blood and gore.  In fact, the film is just as gory as Death-Scort Service which was fucking fantastic.  The effects in this one is great which is something to expect coming from Gatorblade and Sleaze Box.  When it comes to indie horror they have been raising the bar when it comes to gore.  The kills are weak for the most part but, big but, the enjoyment comes from the dismemberment.  The effects are great and work well with these scenes.  Overall, Cannibal Claus is another fucking disgusting piece of raunchy cinema...I fucking love it.  The women are dangerous and Bob Glazier is a beast on camera.  The story does need the fat trimmed but no movie is perfect.  If you want a movie to build the muscles in your right arm then look no further.  Check it out.

Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death Blu-Ray

http://mvdshop.com/products/cannibal-women-in-the-avocado-jungle-of-death-blu-ray
These women are serious about their TASTE in men. To avoid a serious avocado shortage, the U.S. government hires feminist anthropology professor Margo Hunt (Shannon Tweed) to find the man-eating Piranha Women tribe who inhabit the avocado jungle of Southern California. Assisted by chauvinist Jim (Bill Maher) and a dimwitted student named Bunny, Hunt must convince the tribe to move to Malibu condos while simultaneously fending off her rival Dr. Kurtz (Adrienne Barbeau). Meanwhile, Bunny's contemplating joining the Piranha gals...but she must consume Jim first.

Wo

Microwave Massacre Blu-Ray

http://mvdshop.com/products/microwave-massacre-blu-ray-dvd-blu-ray

THEY CAME FOR DINNER...TO FIND THEY WERE IT!! Microwave Massacre stars legendary stand-up comedian and actor Jackie Vernon as Donald, a disgruntled construction worker whose wife's predilection for haute cuisine drives him to cannibalism. Donald unwittingly stumbles upon a solution to his two major problems in his life - his nagging wife and his lack of tasty meals - when, one night, he bludgeons his better half to death with a pepper grinder in a drunken rage. Thinking on his feet, Donald dismembers the body and sets about microwaving the remains, which turn out to be rather delicious. Trouble is, now he's got a taste for human flesh that needs satisfying... Eschewing all notions of good taste, Wayne Berwick's Microwave Massacre is a deliciously depraved exercise in political incorrectness that has gone on to gain a cult following thanks to a characteristically deadpan performance from lead Vernon, who delivers such choice lines as "I'm so hungry I could eat a whore". Vegetarians need not apply!

Brand new 2K restoration of the original camera negative
High Definition Blu-ray (1080p) and Standard Definition DVD presentations
Original Mono audio (uncompressed PCM on the Blu-ray)
Optional English subtitles for the deaf and hard of hearing
Brand new audio commentary with writer-producer Craig Muckler moderated by Mike Tristano
Brand new making-of featurette including interviews with Muckler, director Wayne Berwick and actor Loren Schein
Reversible sleeve featuring original and newly commissioned artwork to be revealed
First pressing only: fully-illustrated collector’s booklet featuring new writing on the film by Nightmare USA author Stephen Thrower

Zombie Holocaust / Doctor Butcher M.D. Blu-Ray Severin

Like most good cannibal affairs, “Zombie Holocaust” starts off in the big city but soon enough moves to a more suitable gut munching zone… the jungle. The plot moves along quickly; we are introduced to our characters and a catalyst in the disguise of flesh eating foreigners.  A team is assembled to figure out why these foreigners are practicing cannibalism and why they all appear to have come from the same geographical location. Our leads are soon on their way. Included are a few notables; video nasty favorite, Ian McCulloch (Zombie), Alexandra Delli Colli, and Sherry Buchanan. Our adventurers are aligned with a local Doctor (Donald O’Brien) who shares his hospitality and workers to help them with their mission. They soon realize they are in grave danger as they are eaten off one by one. Zombie Holocaust’s onslaught of insanity continues as the Doctor who was once thought there to help them turns out to be responsible for the carnage. He has been practicing grotesque experiments that have resulted in the natives going awry and spawned a batch of murdering zombies.  

A plot like this has enough substance and cheese to make three Italian gore fests, but here we are treated to just one bizarrely beautiful disaster.  “Zombie Holocaust” sports a truly amazing score which seems so much more poignant and heartfelt than the film, itself.  A major highlight are the top notch Italian splatter effects we have all grown to love; the slit throats are some of the best to grace dingy theaters anywhere. The clay molded zombies are cheap but effective and with the amount of innards spilled, it would be enough to feed a small horde of zombies. The dialogue is unintentionally hilarious and the sound effects match it.   “Zombie Holocaust” has no shame in what it is; a cash in on successful films of the genre that have come before like “Emmanuelle and the Last Cannibals” and “Zombie” using Donald O’Brien from the former and Dakar, Ian McCulloch, and the locations from the later. “Zombie Holocaust” flows by at a fairly brisk pace giving us splatter or nudity when it can, never slowing down to realize how ridiculous the whole ordeal is. Directed by the father of Enzo G. Castellari, a very prominent director, Marino Girolami (with over 70 credits to his name) turns in a surprising horror exploitation number in a very capable way.  “Zombie Holocaust” is a must for fans of Italian Cannibal and Zombie flicks. On this rare occasion, they are both in one film fighting for screen time. Another rarity this film can brag about is that we are spared the awful animal cruelty usually associated with the cannibal films from this time.

Severin’s release of “Zombie Holocaust” isn’t the first Blu-Ray release of the film, but I can assure you it has got to be the best.  Included are two prints of the film, each on their own disc. One print included is the one that caused an uproar on 42nd Street in New York, “Doctor Butcher M.D.”. “Doctor Butcher M.D.” has got to have one of the most outstanding taglines of all time: “He's a depraved, homicidal killer...and he makes house calls!”. Just as outstanding is how the tagline came to be, created by the Aquarius Releasing to put asses in seats in the theater; this information is relayed by the owner of the company in a wonderful interview included on the disc.  This cut of the film is trimmed for pacing and includes an alternate opening directed by Roy Frumkes (Street Trash). This opening was used to avoid paying extra for the title “Zombie Holocaust”. The scene is shoe horned in and forcefully made to look as if it is part of the affair; we are also given the scene separately on the disc to see as much as we can of the unfinished film. Both prints look great for these types of films and offer a grainy yet nice looking picture quality.  A slew of extras and interviews round out the rest of the discs, including interviews with Sherry Buchanan, Ian McCulloch, Rick Sullivan (Gore Gazette),  Jim Markovic, Rosario Prestopino (FX), Maurizio Trani (FX) , and Terry Levine.  Other extras include locations now and then, trailers, a walk around with Roy Frumkes and Chris Poggiali, Enzo Castellari remembering his father, and more. The “Doctor Butcher” disc seems to focus on the theater experience, while the interviews with cast and crew from the film appear on the “Zombie Holocaust” disc. This edition even comes with a barf bag so you don’t make a mess from all the excitement.  

Severin seems to have outdone themselves with the amount of care and hard work put forth on this release.  It’s refreshing for Severin to have taken an exploitation film and given it the utmost respect and treatment that most wouldn’t. The best compliment you can give to a niche label is that they have given a film a treatment that it seemingly doesn’t deserve. Severin has given the vastly entertaining yet undeniably stupid film “Zombie Holocaust” just that.

Film 4/5: Let’s face it “Zombie Holocaust” isn’t winning any academy awards, but for what it is. It doesn’t get much better.

Release 5/5: Has more features than I could imagine on the disc. It looks good, sounds good, and has both cuts of the film, even a deleted scene that’s absent in most prints.

http://www.cavd.com/product.php?productid=2684

https://www.amazon.com/Doctor-Butcher-Zombie-Holocaust-Blu-rays/dp/B01GGPI1R6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1468724812&sr=8-1&keywords=doctor+butcher

DISC 1 DOCTOR BUTCHER MD - Featurette: Butchery & Ballyhoo: Interview with Aquarius Releasing's Terry Levine - Featurette: Down On The Deuce: Nostalgic Tour Of 42nd Street With Temple Of Shock's Chris Poggiali and Filmmaker Roy Frumkes - Roy Frumkes' Segment Of Unfinished Anthology Film 'Tales That Will Tear Your Heart Out' - Featurette: The Butcher Mobile: Interview with Gore Gazette Editor & Butcher Mobile Barker Rick Sullivan - Featurette: Cutting Doctor Butcher: Interview with Editor Jim Markovic - Illustrated Essay: Experiments With A Male Caucasian Brain (...and other memories of 42nd Street) by Gary Hertz - Theatrical Trailer - Video Release Trailer 1 - Video Release Trailer 2 DISC 2 ZOMBIE HOLOCAUST - Featurette: Voodoo Man: Interview With Star Ian McCulloch - Featurette: Blood Of The Zombies: Interview With FX Master Rosario Prestopino - Featurette: Filmmaker Enzo Castellari Remembers His Father Director Marino Girolami - Featurette: Sherry Holocaust: Interview With Actress Sherryl Buchanan - Featurette: Neurosurgery Italian Style -Interview With FX Artist Maurizio Trani - Featurette: New York Filming Locations Then Vs. Now. A look at the Big Apple locales as they are today - Audio Bonus: Ian McCulloch Sings Down By The River - International Trailer - German Trailer

Mrparka Review's "American Horror Project Vol. 1" (Malatesta's Carnival of Blood, The Witch Who Came from the Sea, and The Premonition)

http://mvdb2b.com/s/AmericanHorrorProjectVol1BlurayDVD/AV043
http://www.arrowfilms.co.uk/category/usa/

Devil Hunter

Director - Jess Franco (Zombie Lake, Hellhole Women)
Starring - Ursula Buchfellner (The Story of Linda), Al Cliver (Zombie, The Beyond), and Antonio Mayans (Oasis of the Zombies)
Release Date - 1980
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Hunted, raped, and tormented out of her mind..."
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I love horror as a collective genre.  The genre as a whole has so much to offer from slashers, to zombies, to even period pieces.  The genre is home to so much.  As a collective it is amazing but when you pick the genre apart and put it into sub-genre then you will find sub-genres that at not so entertaining.  For me, giallo and jungle cannibal flicks are the weakest of the genre.  Last night I was able to review the first film in a double feature released by Severin on blu.  The second on this set is Devil Hunter from director Jess Franco.  Me and Franco have a love/hate relationship.  His films are either extremely entertaining or downright boring.  Where did Devil Hunter fall under?

     The film follows a young woman who is kidnapped by a group of goons and taken deep in the jungle to wait for their ransom.  The young girl is a model and her agent brings in a war vet to deliver the money and get the girl.  The man agrees and heads into the jungle unaware that the jungle is inhabited by cannibals that want to turn them all into cannibal shit.


   Devil Hunter is a film I wanted to like.  Not because Franco directed it but because it starred Fulci regular Al Cliver.  Cliver can be seen in Zombi, The Beyond, and The Black Cat.  All three are amazing films and he does a fantastic job in his roles in all three but Devil Hunter was just nowhere near the same level.  The acting in this one is not as good as Cannibal Terror.  Most of the cast tries way too hard and their performances are almost laughable.  This makes Cliver and his performance feel out of place and awkward to watch.  He was handed the clean side of a shit stick with his role in this one.  The story for this one is the exact same as CT with the exception that the kidnapped woman is older and a model instead of a little girl wanting her daddy.  The film still follows the same plot where a group finds themselves in a cannibal's jungle and are forced to fight for their lives.  Nothing new and nothing entertaining.  Finally, the film has several kills on screen but they are painfully dull and lack all imagination.  Cannibal movies need guts and gore not 15 minutes of primitives primal dancing around their huts.  Overall, Devil Hunter was the one film out of the two I was looking forward to and the one that let me down the most.  The film is bland and has nothing that sets itself apart from the rest.  I cant recommend this one and suggest checking out another flick if you are wanting something to fill your cannibal fix.