Morbus

Director - Ignasi P. Ferre (Sitges-Nagasaki, Sota el Signe De)

Starring - Roman Ferre (Bloody Sex, Porno: Situacion), Carmen Serret (The Gypsy), Joan Borras (Change of Sex, Teatre)

Release Date - 1983

Genre - Horror

Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Over the years I've learned that the 80s truly was a high point in horror cinema.  I'm not saying it was the best decade for the genre, because it honestly wasn't, but there was a lot of memorable moments.  Sometime during the late 70s several genre titles were released where they tossed in so many different horror tropes.  It never really caught on with some of these films falling into obscurity while others became cult classics.  However, this trend came somewhat popular with a lot of movies, especially direct to video titles, throwing "everything including the kitchen sink" into the story.  The writers couldn't make their mind up with which way they wanted the movie to go and we were given some wild films with stories that are extremely unpredictable.  As I work my way through this Exorcismo set I'm hit with another early 80s horror title that does the same thing.  I thought Morbus was another nudie flick due to the poster but once I hit play on that disc I realized it a nudie flick with an everything horror has to offer story.

     The film follows a prostitute who is running for her life when her friend, also a prostitute, and a John are killed by zombies after a scientist has created a serum that brings the dead back to life.  She finds her way to the home of a struggling writer.  The two try to leave before they are overrun by zombies but discover that his assistant has sabotaged their ride.  They are forced to stay and fight but zombies are the least of their worries as they soon encounter a Satanic sex cult.  

     I went into Morbus completely blind and while several films in this set surprised, none shocked me like this one did.  Morbus is not what I would call a good movie.  It's campy, with stiff acting, and a story that is all over the place but I had so much fucking fun with it.  This is the kind of movie that itf it was made in the US I could see Joe Bob hosting a showing of.  The acting in this one is extremely campy.  The characters are one dimensional and we don't get a lot of emotional range but it works for the film.  We don't have any memorable characters or performances but the story more than makes up for it.  The story for this one is all over the fucking place and that is why I enjoyed it so much.  We have an evil scientist, zombies, prostitutes, aspiring horror writers, Satanic bikers in a sex cult, and so much nudity.  The film does struggle with pacing and it has no idea how to put them all together in a coherent story but the unpredictable and absurd ride makes it worth your time.  Finally, the film has some blood, some decent make-up effects, and a lot of skin.  The zombies look decent in a way but are not that memorable while the effects are minimal.  They fit the film but nothing that most of us genre fans are looking for.  Overall, Morbus is a film that has so much going on and while is struggles with it's own identity, is still delivers on an experience.  It reminds me a lot of films like Spookies and Neon Maniacs.  It's a good film but far from perfect.  Check it out. 

Longlegs

Director - Osgood Perkins (The Twilight Zone, Gretel and Hansel)

Starring - Maika Monroe (It Follows, The 5th Wave), Nicolas Cage (Mandy, Renfield), and Blair Underwood (Dear White People, Ironside)

Release Date - 2024

Genre - Horror

Format - UHD (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     Nic Cage has been one of my favorite actors for many years.  I grew up on his classics like Face/Off, Con Air, Once Bitten, Raising Arizona, and so on.  While he did hit a bit of a dry spell with the Left Behind films along with the two Ghostrider movies, he seems to have found his second wind with the smaller budget films like Mandy, Color Out of Space, Willy's Wonderland, and the recent hit Longlongs.  I heard a lot about Longlegs and how it was written and directed by Osgood Perkins but I had no idea Cage was attached.  I ordered the UHD release of the film and when it arrived I saw his name attached to it.  That made me immediately move the film to the top of my watch list.  

     The film follows an young agent who is working on a case where young kids were murdered and strange occurrences happened inside the home.  When she starts to uncover a pattern she realizes that the person responsible for the deaths is connected to another crime where an entire family was murdered.  The revelation of the killer leads her to her family home and a dark secret her mother has been hiding for decades.

     Longlegs is one of the genre films that immediately became a hit among horror fans.  I heard so much about the film to the point that I almost skipped it.  Movies that are typically hyped up by pop horror fans tend to be underwhelming to me.  However, after getting the film in for my collection and seeing it featured Nic Cage I knew I had to check it out.  I'm glad I did because it was one of the better films of the year and probably one of my favorite performances from Cage to date.  The acting in this one is absolutely amazing.  Monro and Underwood are fantastic.  They really do hold their scenes and the characters they bring to life make the movie.  Also, they work so well together and their on screen dynamic really shows how talented they really are.  With that being said, Cage makes the film what it is.  He's absolutely unhinged in this movie and damn near unrecognizable.  I've seen damn near everyone of his films to date and this was the first time he gave me goosebumps.  I couldn't see this film having the same impact if someone else had took on the role of Longlegs.  The story for this one is a bit of a stretch but I enjoyed it for the most part.  I loved the gritty true crime aspect.  It reminded me a lot of Se7en and Kodiak which are two of the most underrated films of all time.  We then get the Satanic aspect that I absolutely love.  I grew up during the Satanic Panic of the late 80s and early 90s and love seeing this incorporated into true crime films.  With that being said, the film does hit the paranormal on it's final stretch which does throw the movie off some but not enough to ruin it.  If the film was going to go that route I wish it would have embraced it from the beginning instead of just dipping it's toes in it during the last stretch of the film.  Finally, this is not a gruesome film.  We do get some blood and great make-up effects on Cage but the main focus of the film is the characters and rich story.  Overall, Longlegs is another fantastic pop horror film that I did not expect to enjoy as much as I did.  This is going to be a genre film that fans will remember for many years to come.  I urge anyone that is on the fence about this one to give it a go.  You will not be disappointed.  

The Toxic Avenger Part III: The Last Temptation of Toxie

Director(s) - Michael Herz (The First Turn On!!, Stuck on You!) and Lloyd Kaufman (A Halloween Carol, Shakespeare's Shitstorm)

Starring - Ron Fazio (The Supernatural Diaries, Clover), Phoebe Legere (King of New York, Marquis de Slime), and Rick Collins (Vampire's Embrace, Parts of the Family)

Release Date - 1989

Genre - Action/Comedy

Tagline - "The real American superhero"

Format - UHD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I've learned a bit about genre fans, more specifically Troma fans, the last few days while I was watching the new UHD Toxic Avenger box set. I've always like the film series as a whole but never realized that many Troma fans dislike Toxic Avengers II and III. While the films are very different from the first and fourth film in the series, they are unique in how they were shot which may be why so many Troma fans dislike them. While both films were filmed as one film and then split up due to the amount of footage does create a bit of an odd flow for these two films, but I enjoy them. Like always, I want to thank MVD and Troma for sending over this box set! 

      Toxie has once again cleaned up Tromaville and has entered severe depression when he learns of a surgery that could restore his beloved's eyesight. Sadly, he doesn't have the ridiculous sum of money required to get her the surgery. He agrees to be a spokesperson for Apocalypse Inc. where he is able to afford her surgery while inadvertently turning his back on Tromaville and his fans. As the money comes rolling in he becomes less like himself and more like a corporate sellout. He soon realizes this and returns to his old ways resulting in a battle between Toxie and the evil leader of Apocalypse Inc., the devil himself. 

      If I was to take the time to rank all the Toxic Avenger films, Toxic Crusaders included, Part III would be low man on the totem pole. It's not that I hate it because I most definitely don't, but I would rather be watching one of the other films in the series over this one. With that being said, it's hard not to watch Part II without following it up with Part III. The acting in this one is obviously consistent with Part II considering both films were filmed as one and then split during editing. Nothing I can really say here that I didn't say in my review for Part II. I like the energy, the personalities that each character brings to the screen, and the dedication they all have for their roles. The story for this one does bring everything full circle but I feel like the elements that made Part II so enjoyable are lacking here. I loved the trip through Japan and watching learn about their customs, culture, and fighting styles. We have some Troma-inspired slapstick, and a lot of great characters. In Part III we have a return to Tromaville where Toxie becomes a corporate flunky that just doesn't work. It's a bit dull and very predictable once it starts rolling. I liked how the evil corporation is a front for the devil and the big battle at the end is a lot of fun but the film just doesn't have the spunk as the previous two films. Finally, the film once again showcases a lot of DIY effects. We get some great make-up effects, more bloody moments, and a few memorable deaths scenes. While the effects are not the focus of the film, they still work, especially when you consider the film's budget. Overall, Part III is still a great addition to the Troma franchise but it is the weakest of the four films. Check it out.

Debbie Does Demons

Director - Donald Farmer (Cannibal Cop, Shark Exorcist)

Starring - Jessa Flux (Shingles: The Movie, Deadly Dealings), Angel Nichole Bradford (Wolf Hollow, Mothman), and Morrigan Thompson (Girl blood Sport, The Curse of Lilith Ratchet)

Release Date - 2023

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "Sorry!  Debbie doesn't do vampires."
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Filmmaker Donald Farmer has one hell of a career in filmmaking spanning damn near 50 years. No matter how you slice it, he has contributed to horror longer than most of us have been alive. Starting in the early 70s before snowballing into his more popular films in the 80s and 90s, he’s been working on one project of another for half a century resulting in classics like Demon Queen, Dorm of the Dead, Invasion of the Scream Queens, Savage Vengeance, and many more. I’ve been lucky enough to review some of his newer films like his remake of Cannibal Hookers and Hooker with a Hacksaw. I respect what he does and how he fully embraces the old horror cliché that blood and boobs sells movies. It may not be a selling point for me but I do love watching a movie that has both of them in it. I was all in when he announced his newest film Debbie Does Demons. The artwork and casting really caught my eye and I followed the project closely sharing everything he announced on the site. A few days back he asked for critics and reviewers to reach out to him to review the flick and I rushed to my messages to hit him up. He was kind enough to send over a link and here we are! 

      The film follows a late night horror host who finds herself stuck in the middle of a group of friends who decided playing with an Ouija board was a good idea and the evil Carmilla that they resurrected. Now, the late night horror host is forced to confront the witch Carmella before she can fuck the remaining friends and turn them into her mindless minions.

      Debbie Does Demons was nothing like I was expecting exactly. It was sleazy and full of humor with the title being very fitting but I was hoping for a film that had a little more to the story. Don’t get me wrong, I really enjoyed what we got but I was hoping for an indie horror release with a bit more story behind it. The acting in this one is a lot of fun. Indie darlings Jessa Flux, Roni Jonah, Angel Bradford, Dixie Gers, and Morrigan Thompson all appear in the film along with indie actor Adam Freeman among several others that I’m not too familiar with. However, I loved the casting here and the performances they deliver. The characters made the film for me and I love seeing so many familiar faces take them on. We get a lot of energy, dedication, and personality that pulls the viewer in. The story for this one is Fright Night meets Debbie Does Dallas. We follow the lustful and evil Carmilla who is resurrected via Ouija board and is now fucking those that brought her back and turning them into her slaves. We then have Debbie, the late night horror host, who is brought into the chaos to stop Carmilla due to her knowledge of horror and the occult. It’s a fun film especially for those of us that grew up during the cable access days with no budget horror hosts and Fright Night on VHS. It’s full of nudity and just enough cliched horror to make it fun without overdoing it. Some of the scenes could be edited down a bit to make the pacing work better but it’s still enjoyable as is. Finally, the film has plenty of blood. The effects are solid in regards to what you would typically find in a S.O.V. horror flick . We get a great deal of practical effects but they are nothing that really stands out. Hell, if anything they bring some unexpected laughs. Overall, Debbie Does Demons is the type of film many of you are looking for. It has beautiful women, blood, and some laughs. It could have used some memorable death scenes but it’s still entertaining as it is. Check it out.

Spin the Wheel

Director(s) - Neil Chase and David Heacock (Boneyard Racers, Babageddon)

Starring - Dianne Wulf (The Legend of Mindi, Smile: It's Only the End of the World), Neil Chase (Broken, The Academy), and S-Raj Kumar (Gone by Dawn, Dookie Squad)

Release Date - 2023

Genre - Drama/Thriller

Tagline - "Killing time at the end of the world"

Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I get asked to review horror from all walks of life. These range from amateur backyard flicks from teenagers with their phones or a parent’s camera to full time filmmakers with a modest (among indie standards) budgets. I love seeing and reviewing the wide range of films sent my way. Occasionally I get a film that’s not really horror but has some genre inspired elements that makes it right at home at Horror Society. A few weeks ago I was asked to review the feature length dark thriller Spin the Wheel. This was not a horror film in a traditional sense but it did have some horror inspired aspects that peaked my interested. I agreed to check it out and when I could finally work it into my schedule I did. I’m glad I did because I really enjoyed this one. 

      The film follows a group of random strangers from various walks of life who assemble in a small bar as the world outside is burning. The world is expected to fully be engulfed in fire within the next hour so some have decided to spend their last moments alive drinking. With drinks in hand they are enticed to play a game by an enigmatic stranger who tries to convince them all that he is the devil. Everyone agrees to the game and after multiple rounds of Russian roulette they discover he may be who he says he is and the world could be up for grabs. 

      A year or so ago I reviewed the short Boneyard Racers and was really Impressed by the film. The production quality, story, and acting were all top notch. The team involved really had something special on their hands and could have turned it into an effective feature. When Neil Chase hit me up to review a feature film he wrote and directed I knew it was going to be just as amazing and I was right. Spin the Wheel was fantastic. It’s a dark thriller with fantasy and horror elements that works surprisingly well. The acting in this one is fucking great. EVERYONE carries their own weight in this one. Some characters are a little more enjoyable than others but that’s the writing at play instead of the acting. This is perfect casting and everyone does a phenomenal job. The story for this one has a slow build up but the dialogue and character interaction is very well written. The backdrop of the film is a great way to bring everyone into the bar and have them play the game but I would have loved more backstory about the apocalyptic event along with less news broadcasts. The movie is great as is but I feel like a great opportunity was missed with this. Finally, the film doesn’t really have a lot of blood and gore. It’s a character driven piece but there is a death or two that take place off screen giving the viewer use of their imaginations. Overall, Spin the Wheel is one of the more polished films I’ve reviewed in recent years with a solid story and one hell of a cast. It’s not a true horror film but those of you looking for a fun thriller will really appreciate this one. I highly recommend it.

Heartland of Darkness

Director - Eric Swelstad (Frankenstein Rising, The Curse of Lizzie Borden 2: Prom Night)

Starring - Dino Tripodis (Criminal Minds, The Funny Man), Nick Baldasare (Road Meat, They Bite), and Shanna Thomas 

Release Date - 1992

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "An evil place between Heaven and Hell... the sanctuary of death"

Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5): 

     I’m a huge fan of Wild Eye Releasing so it was a no brainer when they announced their sister company Visual Vengeance to release S.O.V. horror flicks. I’ve worked with Wild Eye in the past and love their dedication to the genre, so I was looking forward their new label. So far, I’ve been very impressed with the releases. Most were first time watches for me and the special features and additions in the releases are fantastic for collectors. Back in October or so it was announced that the Visual Vengeance would be releasing Heartland of Darkness starring Linnea Quigley. I had never heard of this one but the press release and trailer sold me on it. I tried to secure a review copy around the time it was released and was unable to but last month Wild Eye sent a copy over to check out. After watching the classic Bubba Ho-Tep on UHD I decided to follow it up with something I had never seen before. I decided it was the perfect time to check out Heartland of Darkness. I want to thank Wild Eye for sending this one over. 

      The film follows a man and his teenage daughter that move to a small town to run the local newspaper. Within the first few days he is responding to a mutilated body found in the woods near town. He meets the shady priest that is very pushy and suspects something is going behind closed doors but is unable to prove it until his new journalist, who is actually and undercover agent investigating Satanic cults, starts pointing it out to him. When he stumbles into a shrine in the back room of one of the businesses he quickly finds himself at the center of the cult, who is parading as a Catholic church, and must fight to save his daughter before she can be their next sacrifice for the dark lord. 

      I absolutely loved Heartland of Darkness. I know trolls and edgelords will be scurrying to the comment section ready to throw down about how I was paid to write this, and the film wasn’t that good. The thing is, the film is that good. It was a lot of fucking fun especially if you dig S.O.V. horror. Hell, even if you don’t it still hits the spot if you are looking for a late-night horror fix. The acting in this one is was surprisingly well done. When I toss in a classic S.O.V. title I expect to find a film made by friends or family in their backyard with the family camcorder. Not all S.O.V. flicks are like that but that’s the mindset I often find myself in. This one has a fantastic cast and sizeable amount of screen time from Linnea Quigley. I was expecting to only see her in the film for a few minutes, but she is actually in the film for a bit and doesn’t disappoint. With that being said, the rest of the cast really surprised me. The film’s stars Dino Tripodis, Nick Baldasare, and Shanna Thomas really make the film. They are fully invested in the film and do a fantastic job. The same can be said about the supporting cast. Some inexperience rears it’s ugly head from time to time but that doesn’t ruin the experience. I really liked the story, but I did find it to be a little too goofy at times. The idea of a cult parading around as Christians killing those that get in their way while offering sacrifices to Satan in a small town really pulled me in. I liked the idea of the small town coming together to form an evil cult especially when you consider that this was made during the waning years of the Satanic Panic scare that left suburban parents trembling. With that being said, parts of the story, like the part where the government is investigating clusters of cults in small towns across the U.S. I found the Satanic cult aspect to be a little far-fetched and that’s coming from someone who was raised in the tail end of the Satanic Panic and know several people in the Satanic Church. Regardless, I liked it but a different type of cult would have been more enjoyable. Finally, the film has a few death scenes but nothing that would stick out to avid genre fans. We get some weak make-up effects and the kills rely mostly on the viewer’s imagination rather than practical effects. Overall, Heartland of Darkness is a must see for fans of S.O.V. horror. I fucking loved it and I love this release from Visual Vengeance. I can’t recommend this one enough. Do yourself a favor and check out this early 90s Satanic fun.

Satan Lives: The Rise of the Illumanatti Hotties

Director - Sean Donohue (Naked Cannibal Campers, Zed's Dead)

Starring - Jessa Flux (Voorhees: Night of the Beast, Cannibal Hookers), Sushii Xhyvette Holder (Kill-Cam, The Cheerleader Sleepover Slaughter), and Bob Glazier (Cannibal Claus, Amerikan Holokaust)

Release Date - 2022

Genre - Horror

Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     

     Sean Donohue is a filmmaker that I greatly admire. I try not to send too much praise his way for fear of it going to his head but he truly is one of my favorite filmmakers especially when I’m in the mood for blood and nudity. He is the extreme counterpart to filmmakers Chris Seaver and Richard Mogg in my opinion. I’ll spin a Seaver or Mogg flick if I want some laughs and cheap effects with a story that parodies or pays tribute to films I grew up with. On the opposite side of the same coin, Donohue is when I’m in a more serious mood and want blood and boobs. His films are more polished than other indie horror productions and rarely let me down. When he announced his newest film, Satan Lives!: The Rise of the Illuminati Hotties, I was ready for it. I couldn’t wait to see what kind of depravity he was bringing our way. A few days back he reached out to me to review it and I couldn’t say yes fast enough. As always, I want to thank Sean and GatorBlade Films for supporting Horror Society and myself. 

      The film follows documentary filmmakers who are filming cult leader Richard Lemeau (Glazier). Lemeau is known for his sexual antics and strange occult practices. In the middle of the of this is a stripper who is tasked with killing him by a new organization known as the Illuminati Hotties. 

      I’m not attempting to suck up to Sean because I wasn’t a fan of his latest film, but I truly believe he is one of the better filmmakers in the indie horror community. His films Die Die Delta Pi and Death-Scort Service are still finding new audiences almost a decade later. While his films may be skin filled and bloody, they are still beautifully shot with stories that appeal to the horror fans that are sick of the remakes, sequels, and prequels to franchises that should have died years ago. I’m not kissing ass or blowing smoke up his, but I honestly believe he is one of the most entertaining filmmakers in the game right now. With that being said, not everything he does appeals to me. His found footage film Dead Residence was a tough one for me to finish but most of you know how much I hate found footage films. Satan Lives!: The Rise of the Illuminati Hotties was one of my most anticipated films especially after he unleashed Naked Cannibal Campers and Sushii’s Sex Séance where he seems to have embraced the sleazier side of his films but the movie just didn’t do it for me. It was 100% a GatorBlade Film’s release but the story didn’t hold my attention like usual and the pacing just didn’t work for me. I wanted to love it but I couldn’t find something to latch on to aside from Jessa Flux and Sushii. The acting in this one is a lot of fun which is exactly what I expected from Sean and his arsenal of actors. We have some familiar GatorBlade faces like Bob Glazier, Sushii, Katie McKinley, Ashley Lynn Caputo and Joe Makowski to name a few. They all deliver great performances and the characters they brought to life made the film for me. Honestly, what the film was lacking in story it more than made up for with wild performances from this cast. I also liked that Sean brought indie starlet Jessa Flux on board and gave her a bigger role than just a cameo. I hope these two work together again in the future.  The story for this one is the kind of story that really gets me excited for indie productions. It’s wild and out there but I found it to a bit too dull. The cult with a sexually abusive leader harboring a dark secret who finds his congregation infiltrated by gorgeous assassins is something straight out of a 70s exploitation flick. I liked the set up and style of the film but the drawn out scenes and dialogue left me wishing more of the world around the cult was explored instead of just the leader. Finally, the film has plenty of blood and boobs but if you are looking for memorable kills then you are out of luck. A few of the deaths are effective head shots that fit the film but the lack of carnage is more than made up for with beautiful women. Overall, Satan Lives!: The Rise of the Illuminati Hottie is decent for a first time watch especially if you are a fan of Sean’s other films but this is one of the few projects of his that I don’t see myself revisiting. I respect the hell out him but you can’t make everyone happy all the time and I’m sure I will be the minority here.

Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things

Director - Bob Clark (Porky's, Black Christmas)

Starring - Alan Ormsby (Death Dream, Lenny), Valerie Mamches (Wanda), and Jeff Gillen (A Christmas Story, The Naked Zoo)

Release Date - 1973

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "You're invited or Orville's "coming out" party..."

Format - UHD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

      Many years ago, I was browsing the used DVDs at the nearest FYE to me. This particular FYE was at Mercer Mall which was over two hours away from my home, but it was the closest one to me. During my middle school and high school years I would often make a trip up there every few months to snag some new horror movies for my collection. One time during one of these many visits I found a copy of Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things and The Undertaker and His Pals on DVD from Diamond Entertainment. I had a few other releases from them, one of which was Slave of the Cannibal God, and I pulled the trigger on this one. I’m glad I did because this would go on to become one of my favorite releases in my collection. The Undertaker and His Pals is rather decent but easily forgettable while Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things is easily one of my favorite zombie flicks. The only downside to this release was its poor quality. I almost upgraded it sometime back when the blu release of the film hit shelves, but I held out for some unknown reason. That changed when VCI announced the release of the film on UHD. I was quick to reach out to MVD to request a review copy. A few weeks later the UHD arrived and I knew I had to make time to check it out. 

      The film follows a theater group, led by the charismatic Alan (Ormsby), who visit an isolated island with the intentions of practicing. However, Alan has a different idea when he has two of his goons dig up the corpse to perform a mock Satanic ritual. When it fails to do anything, they take Orville back to the cottage they are spending the night. They plan on playing games with the corpse but soon the dead begin to rise from their resting places and head to the cottage where the real horror begins. 

      Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things is one of those films that is so simple yet so effective. The title catches people’s eyes and the original poster for the film really draws them in. However, it’s the film’s simple yet effective story that has gained the film the fanbase that it has. I’ve been a huge fan of this one for almost 20 years now and every time I watch it, I fall more and more in love with it. The acting in this one is a lot of fun. The cast is so comfortable around each other and their interactions, for the most part, feel genuine. The characters are so enjoyable and their energy is what makes the film so much fun. With that being said, the film wouldn’t be what it is if it wasn’t for Ormsby. His character is an asshole at heart, but the energy and on-screen presence makes his performance unforgettable. The story for this one is simple and clearly inspired by Night of the Living Dead. We follow a theatre troupe who find themselves in an isolated cabin on an island while the undead are trying to get in. With that being said, the black magic and humor does give the story a completely different feel and completely takes away from the fact that the story is so simple. When you add that with the fully developed characters you have a fantastic zombie film that doesn’t try to replace Night of the Living Dead but instead it compliments it. Finally, the film has some make-up effects that I never really cared for. The zombies look like their faces were painted and then flour was sprinkled over the paint. They look like dried out powdered donuts which is something I’ve never found menacing. It does add some unintentional humor but it’s nothing like the humor written into the film. Also, we get a few bloody deaths with decent enough practical effects but they are strangely enough, not the highlight of the film. Overall, Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things is a must see for zombie fans especially if you are into low budget flicks. I always recommend this one to fans of Romero’s NotLD and this UHD release is fucking top notch. I highly recommend it.

On the Edge

Director(s) - Jen Soska (Rabid, See No Evil 2) and Sylvia Soska (American Mary, Vendetta)

Starring - Jen Soska, Sylvia Soska, and Tommy Pistol (Evil Head, Psycho Sleepover)

Release Date - 2022

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "Jesus wept"

Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Several years ago I was introduced to the Jen and Sylvia Soska, collectively known as the Soska Sisters, after they directed a string of films that had some success among horror fans. I was curious about their work after I heard about their films Dead Hooker in a Trunk, American Mary, and See No Evil 2 under their belts. It was around this time that I realized that the pair was featured in one of the films in Lucifer Valentine’s Vomit Gore Trilogy. Since then I had only seen their remake of Rabid and was a bit disappointed. Since then I’ve been sent several press releases about their newest film On the Edge starring adult film legend and avid horror fan Tommy Pistol. I’ve spoke with Pistol several times on his personal Facebook and Instagram pages about his film The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol along with his appearances in Frankie in Blunderland, Shakespeare’s Shitstorm, Evil Head, and several others. I was really looking forward to this one and when I was sent a screener link to check it out, I jumped at the opportunity. 

     The film follows a wealthy business man with a gorgeous family that has booked 36 hours in a suit. The goal for his 36 hours is to experiment in sadism with a very dominate mistress. Things start out as you would suspect but as the hours slowly move along, he quickly learns that this is not what he was expecting and his past is coming to haunt him. 

      I knew absolutely nothing about On the Edge prior to watching it aside from the fact that it was directed by the Soska Sisters and starred Tommy Pistol. However, after watching it I still don’t know shit about it. I have more questions than the film had answers and my final thought on the film was that it was the Sisters’ way of practicing BDSM on Tommy Pistol which is the dreams of most women that know who he is. I wanted to like it but it felt like a horror focused clone of 50 Shades of Grey similar to Bound and A Darker 50 Shades. The acting in this one is decent, but I was a bit disappointed in how the characters were approached and how they played out in the film. Pistol delivered one of my favorite horror porn performances in Evil Head and seeing him on other genre efforts shows that he knows how to carry a scene. However, watching him cry and baby around for almost two hours really didn’t work for me. I wouldn’t say his performance is bad because it’s not. He shows another emotional range that we rarely see with him but watching him like for as long as we do it becomes a bit dull and boring. The Soska Sisters deliver solid performances as well. Jen Soska does a great job as the evil mistress. I did wonder a few times how much practice she really had in this role prior to filming because it almost felt second nature. With that being said, as the film progressed and more of the story is revealed her performance does become a bit awkward and the audio dubbing is just cringy. They should have left this portion out. The supporting cast does a solid job as well but these two make up most of the film. The story for this one is could have been a lot more effective if they chose a much shorter run time. The story is stretched so thin that the viewer finds himself watching his watch more than the film. The movie should have been no longer than 30 minutes with more emphasis on Pistol’s character’s back story over the torture and degradation of him. I get where the film is coming from. He’s an award-winning adult actor that has a loving fan base so a lot of his followers would be into this but from a movie fan stand point the film is beating a dead horse for well over an hour. So much could be trimmed down from it. Finally, the film has a few visual effects and some bloody moments, but these are nothing memorable. Genre fans watching this expecting gore and great practical effects will be very disappointed. Overall, On the Edge was not for me but it’s blatantly obvious that I was not the intended audience. It would have been a pretty cool flick if it was around 30 or 40 minutes but having a story like this stretched to almost two hours is a huge strain on the viewer and their imaginations. Sadly, I cannot recommend this one.

Hell Van

Director - Jorge Delarosa

Starring - Justin Cash, John Catheline (Robot Duck, Amityville Poo: Killer Poop 2), and Marvin Conner

Release Date - 2022

Genre - Horror/Comedy

Tagline - "Hell has no cruise control"

Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     A couple weeks ago I was browsing through several indie horror groups on Facebook and the same hashtag on Instagram when I came across a couple posts for the new horror film Hell Van.  Honestly, I skipped over it a few times because I thought it looked a lot like another horror film that I enjoy called Creep Van.  Stupid title aside, I actually enjoyed the film and figured it would be a cheap knock off that one.  However, after a few most posts I saw some screenshots of the film and realized that the story may be similar in some ways but it's not a rip off.  Instead, it was something very different and right up my alley.  I was quick to reach out to the film's Facebook page and they were kind enough to send over a review copy of the film on blu.  

     The film follows a Satanic firefighter that burns churches in his down time.  However, after burning down a church with a handful of kids in it, he finds himself on the run from the police.  He decides to shoot himself after proclaiming "hail Satan" before the police are able to capture him.  He commits the heinous act in his red van and soon the van becomes a possessed vehicle for Satan.  Anyone that comes in contact with the evil van finds themselves infected with evil.  They either die a horrible death or something much worse...

     Hell Van was just the kind of no budget indie flick that I look forward to.  It has a story that you can't predict and some humor that is intentional and some not so intentional that makes it a real horror treat especially if you are looking for something different to watch late at night.  The acting in this one is hit or miss.  Some of the scenes are very well done and the cast is very grounded and down to Earth.  However, a few scenes are a little awkward to watch with forced dialogue and emotionless expressions.  It's obvious that the cast is inexperienced but it's not horrible.  Honestly, fans of indie horror can appreciate the cast and their dedication to the roles.  The story for this one really impressed me.  Where it does feature a possessed van like Creep Van that is where the similarities end.  The Satanic angle and where the story goes from there really impressed me.  Hell, I hope there is more to this one than just one film because I feel like there is plenty of meat left on this bone.  Finally, the film has a lot of fun make-up effects and some solid practical effects.  The movie isn't as gory as I was expecting but the effects really impressed me.  I would have loved some memorable deaths but I'll take what I can get.  Overall, Hell Van is the kind of movie that I would highly recommend if you are looking for something new to add to a horror marathon.  With Halloween quickly approaching I highly recommend checking this one out in hopes of getting you in the holiday spirit.  It was a lot of fun.    

The Exorcism of God

Director - Alejandro Hidalgo (The House at the End of Time)

Starring - Maria Gabriela de Faria (Deadly Class, Plan V), Joseph Marcell (The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Doctor Who), Will Beinbrink (It Chapter Two, Hidden in the Woods)

Release Date -2021

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "God and the devil cannot exist in the same body"

Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     One of the most effective sub-genres in horror, at least for me, is religious horror.  I'm not a religious man but after growing up in the bible belt in living in Appalachia I have an unrationed fear of people of religion going too far and hurting people in the name of their beliefs.  Movies like Red State really hits hard with me because I've seen how little devout Christians actually care about other humans when it comes to the extremity of their faith.  However, as an atheist I struggle to find most religious movies actually set around the faith to be frightening or horrifying.  With that being said, there is a film from time to time that is released that is actually fun and genuinely terrifying.  A few days ago I received the religious horror film The Exorcism of God for review.  I was expecting another lackluster religious horror film following the same ol cliches that doesn't work for me but I was wrong.  I actually enjoyed this one.  I'm not in love with it but it was fun for a first time watch.

     The film follows an American priest who is performing an exorcism alone in Mexico when a young woman becomes possessed.  However, the demon flees from her and into the priest forcing him to sleep with the unconscious woman.  For eighteen years he lives with the guilt of what he has done until he discovers that a young woman, in prison for murder, is possessed by an evil presence and is his daughter.  Now he must save her from the evil being and risk his own soul in the process.

     The Exorcism of God is not the new Exorcist or The Omen but it's a fairly enjoyable religious film with some great eerie atmosphere and great tension.  It is a bit predictable but the great cast and dark locations makes this one a very enjoyable first time watch with a little replay value.  The acting in this one is great.  The female cast is fucking fantastic.  When they are possessed they absolutely send chills down the viewer's spine.  It was also great to see Joseph Marcell in a genre film.  Like most people my age, I grew up on The Fresh Prince of Bel Air so it was cool to see him in front of the camera again.  I was really impressed by Will Beinbrink and his performance.  His characters makes the film in my opinion and I sincerely hope we can see a follow up film and where his character goes from here.  The story for this one uses a lot of Catholic horror cliches but it does add some new twists.  The locations the story takes place at makes the film work and the twists, though predictable, are still enjoyable.  The film does struggle with pacing but if you stick with it you will enjoy it.  Finally, the film has some seriously bloody moments and great make-up effects on the possessed.  I was not expecting the bloody and violent deaths or the great looking demons.  Overall, The Exorcism of God does not reinvent the sub-genre but it is a great contribution to it.  I highly recommend especially if you have a love for religious horror.  It's well worth your time.  

Baby Oopsie

Director - William Butler (The Resonator: Miskatonic U, Power Rangers Wild Force)

Starring - Libbie Higgins (Weedjies: Halloweed Night, Trailerville USA), Justin Armistead (She's the Anchor), and Jill Bartlett (The Intern, Punk'd)

Release Date - 2021

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "Time to put baby down!"

Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     While the pandemic put a strain on a lot of businesses it especially hit the movie industry the hardest.  Sets, locations, and production houses were forced to shut down and making a film with limited staff, six feet apart, and masked up is damn near impossible.  However, some movies were able to pop up here and there.  A few weeks ago I was shocked when Full Moon announced the release of their newest Demonic Toys' spin off Baby Oopsie from director and actor William Butler.  I was interested in seeing checking it out and a few days back Full Moon sent over a review link to check it out.  Once again, I want to thank Full Moon for hooking me up.  

     The film follows Sybil Pittman (Higgins) who is an avid doll collector with a web-show with a decent following.  She lives with her emotionally abusive mother and one day she receives a strange package with a damaged doll inside.  She is able to restore it and soon adds it to her collection.  However, this is no ordinary doll.  This is Baby Oopsie from the demonic toys murders that took place in the early 90s.  Soon Baby Oopsie is killing everyone that has wronged Sybil and when the bodies pile up she is forced to stop it before innocent lives are claimed.

     Being able to pull off a feature length film during all this mess is very impressive.  It's even more impressive when the film is actually good.  Modern Full Moon flicks could go either way.  They could be funny and clever with some laughs and deaths or they can be extremely flat with humor that doesn't hold up.  With that being said, I fucking loved Baby Oopsie.  It was very enjoyable and a lot more fun than it should have been.  The acting in this one is great.  I absolutely loved the entire cast and the characters they created are anything but generic.  I absolutely loved Higgins as Sybil.  Her awkwardness and comedic delivery made for a really memorable performance.  The same can be said for Armistead's performance.  I loved the unusual casting and the characters they delivered.  The story for this one is a loose sequel to Demonic Toys but it can be enjoyed by genre fans that have yet to see the 1992 Full Moon classic.  It serves as a great new jumping point while giving the fans something new to latch on to.  It does a great job as establishing new characters with the old while giving fans something new to look forward to.  Some of the scenes do drag on a little bit too long but it doesn't take away from the overall film.  Finally, the film makes good use of practical effects and beautiful puppets.  We get some bloody kills that sometimes happen off screen or was only in frame for a quick second but they did deliver some fun practical effects that you would expect from Full Moon.  Overall, Baby Oopsie was a lot of fun and the movie I didn't know I needed.  It was very enjoyable and I look forward to where this story is going to take me next.  

Fear Street Part Three: 1666

Director - Leigh Janiak (Honeymoon, Outcast)

Starring - Kiana Madeira (The Flash, Dark Matter), Ashley Zukerman (The Pacific, Death Star VR), and Gillian Jacobs (The Twilight Zone, Hot Tub Time Machine 2)

Release Date - 2021

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "End the curse"

Format - Streaming (Netflix)

Rating (out of 5):

     This is a bitter sweet day for me.  Two week ago I watched Part One of the new Fear Street trilogy and was fucking hooked.  The story combines so many horror elements that I love into a slasher that was unlike anything I had seen.  The follow up the next week was something I looked forward to and it did not disappoint.  It yet again delivered a great story wrapped up in another slasher film.  Sadly, today is the premier of the third and final chapter in this Fear Street trilogy but I hope we have more installments later down the line.  

     The film follows Deena (Madeira) as she forms a link with Sarah Fier in 1666 which leads up to her hanging where it is revealed that she was not actually a witch.  Instead, it was Solomon Goode (Zukerman) who made a deal with the devil to give him one name every few years in return for something.  When Deena awakens she tells her brother and Ziggy about it who set a plan in motion to stop the Shadyside slashers and bring Solomon's ancestor, Sheriff Nick Goode, to justice.

     I fucking loved Part One and Two but Part Three wasn't as fun.  It was still a great film but nowhere near the excitement or action as the first two.  With that being said, this one is more story driven and does a great job at answering questions the viewer may have.  The acting in this one is great.  A lot of the cast had to take on dual roles and they do a fantastic job with it.  The characters, even the bad ones, are still enjoyable and most are very memorable.  I can't say anything about the acting in this one that I didn't say in the reviews for the first two.  The story for this one is more centered around what happened to Sarah Fier and how the chosen ones are still killing.  It was a little twist I didn't see coming that works and ties all the movies together nicely.  With that being said, the action and suspense are not as prominent in this installment.  It's story lead and everything else follows.  Finally, this one has several deaths with lots of blood and a solid amount of practical effects.  This installment is not a gruesome as the previous installments but we do get some nice practical effects to feast our eyes on.  Overall, Fear Street Part Three: 1666 is a great ending to a trilogy that I absolutely loved.  It's doesn't have those memorable kills that made the first two so much fun but it does the important task of finishing the story.  I highly recommend check out this series if you haven't.  It was a lot of fun.  

Baphomet

Director - Matthan Harris (They Came from Hell, The Inflicted)

Starring - Colin Ward (The Face of Evil, Trick Shot), Rebecca Weaver (Winter Guest, June Falling Down), and Matthan Harris

Release Date - 2021

Genre - Horror

Tagline - "The ultimate terror has awakened"

Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     We don't get enough horror films centered around cults.  We get a few here or there but we don't get nearly as much as we do slashers and zombie flicks.  I would love to see horror films about cults and witches become the newest trend because I absolutely fucking love them.  A few weeks ago I received a press release for the horror film Baphomet starring Dani Filth of Cradle of Film.  I'm not much of a CoF fan but I was really interested in the film.  I saw that this was yet another titled that MVD was handling so I reached out to them for a review copy which they were kind enough to send over.  Thanks guys!

     The film follows a family who live on a ranch that has been in their family for some time when a young stranger approaches them to buy it.  When the father refuses to sell it he soon finds himself and his family cursed by a cult that needs that land to perform a Satanic ritual.

     I was very curious about this one and enjoyed it for the most part but it was extremely goofy at times.  Hell, it was very goofy but I found it very enjoyable.  The acting in this one is very cheesy at times but I have a fondness for cheese.  Actor and director Matthan Harris made me laugh several times throughout the film with his performance.  These unintentionally funny moments really caught me off guard and it's clear he wrote the character of Mark for himself to portray.  He's fully dedicated to his role but the character's attempt at being a hero mixed with the tone of the film made it feel extremely goofy.  It almost had that same hero vibe as those films you can find on the Christian network.  The rest of the cast delivers solid performances that fit the film very well.  The characters are well written and work.  With that being, the entire Dani Filth cameo should be cut.  It's a cheap ploy to get a recognizable name in the film but having him only appear in a video call really takes the impact away.  He shouldn't be billed in the film if he only appears for two quick Skype calls.  The story for this one is fun but nothing that really sticks out.  A family, who has been on the property for decades, is suddenly terrorized and cursed by a Satanic cult.  I dig the premise but why is the Satanic cult suddenly interested in the property?  It would make more sense to have a new family moving in to the home.  Regardless, I really liked the cult angle and the curses inflicted on the family.  There were really fun and worked well with the story.  Finally, the film has some bloody moments with some simple yet effective practical effects.  It's not gory but the practical and make-up effects looked great.  The only downfall to this is that the demonic creature looked so good but only had a small amount of screen time.  Overall, Baphomet is going to be hit or miss with the genre fans.  Personally, I enjoyed it but the uneven tone of the film and the goofy character did take away from the overall film.  

Flakka 666

Director - Luis Antonio Rodriguez (Border Cartel, The Final Blow)

Starring - Erik Alamia (The 13th Friday, The Blood Tapes), Anna Aparicio, and Nikki Aparicio

Release Date - 2021

Genre - Horror

Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Wild Eye is one of the few companies that give indie productions a voice.  I love getting in new Wild Eye releases.  Even if I don't care for the film I still enjoy watching something that people put a lot of time and hard work into.  It's impossible for me to love everything Wild Eye releases but I do respect a lot of the films I didn't like.  Sometime back I saw that Wild Eye was releasing another installment in their Raw and Extreme line.  Flakka 666 had one of those posters that really caught my attention and I wanted to see it.  I reached out to MVD who was handling the release and they were kind enough to send a copy my way.  Thanks guys!

     The film follows a Mexican drug dealer who is smuggling product across the border when he gets his hands on something a little special.  His drug manufacturer also dabbles in black magic and crafted up a new drug.  However, this new drug is turning the users into flesh-eating zombies.

     I never expect my reviews to help determine if someone should watch a movie or not.  People have already made up their mind when they see the poster or title for a film.  I respect that because I'm the same way.  If people told me that Flakka 666 was a bad movie I wouldn't care because that title and Wild Eye's artwork already peaked my curiosity.  With that being said, Flakka 666 did not live up to it's title and artwork.  It was a very interesting premise that had so much potential but the final film just fell short.  The acting in this one is not bad but it's very inconsistent and at times the cast seems to be lacking energy.  No one can question their dedication to the film but their inexperience shows at time with awkward dialogue.  When you mix this with the slow scenes and lack of character development you get a difficult film to finish.  The story for this one is one that has been done before but with a fantastic Satanic angle.  There has been several films where drug use has lead to the users becoming zombies.  However, the black magic mixed in with it opened up the door to so many possibilities that was never explored.  I would have loved to see more of the black magic explored.  Instead, we get a film that is choppy at times with random scenes put together of people doing drugs and turning into zombies.  Indie productions are plagued with problems from casting, scheduling conflicts and so much more.  The movie plays out like certain scenes were filmed at various times and then put together with little regard to the actual story.  This could be due to issues with filming but I feel as if something is missing.  Finally, the film has plenty of blood but it's not as gory as you would expect from a zombie flick.  The practical effects works fairly well for most of the gags but there is a few times where the effects do show the film's budget.  Overall, Flakka 666 is an interesting idea that falls apart from the script to the camera.  It has some fun moments but the lack of energy and story makes it really hard to finish.  I would love to see this story approached with more attention to the occult and zombies.  

Trump vs. the Illuminati

Director - BC Fourteen (Bigfoot vs. the Illuminati, Bigfoot vs. Megalodon)

Starring - Timothy Banfield (Father's Day, The Undergrounds), Wes Bruff (The Adventures of Hero-Man, Bigfoot vs. Megalodon), and Marco Guzman (Tickles the Clown, Jurassic Planet: The Mighty Kingdom)

Release Date - 2020

Genre - Sci-Fi

Tagline - "The ultimate battle"

Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     A couple times a month I'll review a non-horror releases because I'm a sucker for clever titles, exploitation, and goofy movies.  These reviews usually catch hell on social media when the keyboard warriors who never got the attention they needed growing up decided to comment "this isn't horror" on the reviews until they get a response from someone.  I usually poke fun at them and then I get bored and move on.  Sometimes the films are worth the headache.  Case in point, Trump vs. the Illuminati.  I was browsing MVD a few weeks ago when I saw that they were releasing this animated flick on DVD.  I couldn't pass this one up and reached out to them for a review copy.  After watching the abysmal Interviewing Monsters and Bigfoot I had to finally check this one out.  Thanks MVD for sending this one over!

     The film takes place a thousand years after the destruction of Earth.  A Chinese clone of Donald J. Trump has escaped his science lab and stowed away on a ship before it crash lands on Earth.  Now, alone, he wonders what his next move is when he is confronted by the alien race to join their forces in order to stop Aliester Crowley and the evil Illuminati before they completely take over the galaxy.

     I didn't expect an amazing cinematic experience but I was hoping for something a little more entertaining than what it was. I was all aboard watching this one to see the Trump puns and parodies but that would be the biggest weakness of the film.  The voice acting in this one is not the best.  Banfield is a pretty convincing Trump at times.  There was a few scenes where the Trump voice was extremely forced and but for the most part the Trump voice was great.  With that being said, some of the other voices were a little off.  They were too loud a good portion of the film.  The cast had no volume control and seemed a little too excited to be working on the project.  The story for this one is all over the place but I found myself really enjoying the non-Trump centered portion of the story.  A thousand year old clone of Trump helping aliens sounds like a fantastic idea on paper but this part of the film was a bit of a drag.  The movie spends too much time focusing on Trump isolated on Mars instead of focusing on the actual story.  Once the movie gets going, around the 40 minute mark, the story gets rolling and it's actually pretty entertaining without Trump fucking it up.  Sadly, this last 20 or so minutes is not enough to save the film.  Finally, the animation is very inconsistent.  Some of the scenes I found myself very impressed with it.  The vehicles, backgrounds, and creatures look great.  However, in a good bit of the scenes the animation starts out looking good but starts to lose quality when they move or interact.  Overall, Trump vs. the Illuminati is a huge missed opportunity.  I would love to see a film more focused on the story rather than mocking Trump.  Don't get me wrong, fuck Trump, but mocking him can't carry a film.  Skip it.