Cockraiser

 



Director - Vuko
Starring - April O'Neil (Ten Inch Mutant Ninja Turtles: The XXX Parody, Fap to the Future: The XXX Parody), Tommy Pistol (Grindsploitation, The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol), and Daisy Ducati (Evil Bong 777, Blood Sister)
Release Date - 2017
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "He'll tear your holes apart"
Format - Streaming

Rating (out of 5):

 

     My love for horror knows no bounds and sometimes I find myself in some strange territory.  Over the years I've watched some pretty crazy horror movies and over time I've found myself actually enjoying movies I never thought I would.  Several years ago I came across the movies Evil Head, Fuckenstein, and The XXXorcist on DVD.  I went ahead and grabbed them and found myself really enjoying their absurd story.  Evil Head especially is a damn fun time that really embodies the film it is parodying.  A few years back I received a press release for the Woodrocket/Pornhub parody of Hellraiser that was perfectly titled as Cockraiser.  I'm sure some of you remember the press release on the site because it was popular for sometime after I posted it.  I never did check out this film but with October in full swing and my rule of watching movies I have yet to see landed me on the doorstep of the Woodrocket YouTube channel.  After watching the trailer for Cockraiser I went ahead and marched my happy ass to Pornhub to check it out. 

     The film follows a couple as the move back into their family home after the man's brother killed himself in a locked room upstairs.  The wife had an affair with the deceased brother and goes upstairs to pay her respects in the very room he killed himself in.  However, he is far from gone is able to communicate with her from the other side.  He uses his supernatural powers to send over his slimy dick and she is able to enjoy it.  After her paranormal encounter she leaves the room and soon the lament configuration (or a rubiks cube that looks like one) appears.  A friend of theirs is able to open it freeing Penishead who abuses her holes.

     Movies like The Walking Dead Hardcore Parody, Night of the Giving Head, Evil Head, and so on are movies that I love to add to my collection.  I may not like them all but I love having them sitting on my shelf.  Sadly, a lot of these horror porn parodies are just not as entertaining as their titles.  Cockraiser is one of those films.  The movie is only around 30 minutes long but it's easily 25 minutes longer than it should be.  The acting in this one is actually better than what you would expect from a movie on Pornhub.  Sure, it's campy but it's still leagues better than your standard fuck flick.  I will say that I was virtually unaware of who April O'Neil was before this but now I'm a fan.  The story for this one takes the porn spin to the classic Hellraiser story but once the groundwork is laid the film kicks it into high gear for the fucking.  Sex aside, I like what they started with the Cockraiser angle but the film doesn't follow up with it which is understandable considering it's a porn.  Finally, no flesh being ripped from bone in this porn parody.  No blood or gore as well.  Just two hot ladies and some fucking to be had with this porn parody.  Overall, Cockraiser is an entertainment from a porn perspective (April O'Neil, am I right?) but for those looking for a porn parody like Evil Head will be very disappointed. 



Terrifier

 



Director - Damien Leone (All Hallow's Eve, Frankenstein vs The Mummy)
Starring - Jenna Kanell (The Vampire Diaries, Super Sunday), Samantha Scaffidi (The Apocalypse Survival Guide, Demon Hole), and David Howard Thornton (Gotham, The Bravest Knight)
Release Date - 2016
Genre - Horror
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     This October has taken a fucking abysmal turn.  So far this month I've watched some amazing horror movies.  Some were new while others are classics that I'm just now getting around to checking out.  While I was on the hunt for movies I've never seen before I decided to toss in the horror anthologies All Hallow's Eve and All Hallow's Eve 2.  The first film was just horrible.  It took me two days to finally finish it.  The second film had a couple awesome segments but the remaining segments bring the movie down.  Terrifier is the main reason I watched these two films.  I had heard nothing but good things about Terrifier before I watched it.  However, when I posted that I was checking it out some of my social media friends posted that this film was more meh than anything.  After checking it out I have to agree with them.  Where were they before I got excited for it?
     The film follows two women returning from a Halloween party when they spot an odd clown lurking in the dark alley near their car.  They leave and go for a quick bite and the clown finds them at the pizzeria.  After a weird encounter with him they go to their car to leave and find the tire flat.  One of them calls their sister for a ride but it will be sometime before she can pick them up.  They sit in the car for a few moments but one needs to use the restroom and ask an exterminator (working odd hours) to let her in an abandoned building to piss.  He agrees and while she is gone the clown kidnaps her friend.  The building she is in is the same building that the clown calls home and soon a game of cat and mouse ensues before he is able to grab the second woman.  He eventually kills them both and anyone else that wonders into the building.  Eventually, the young woman's sister arrives and another game of cat and mouse follows.
     I went into this one with a lot of excitement.  I heard so many great things prior to viewing it and even ignore the fact that All Hallow's Eve, the film Terrifier is a spin off of, was total shit.  Sadly, Terrifier was the textbook example of Wal-Mart horror.  The film looks very appealing on the shelf but the movie is mediocre at best.  Director Mike Lombardo said it best; "Terrifier is an FX demo reel" and I fully agree with that.  The acting in this one is over done.  I love slashers with overdramatic acting but this one just didn't fit the film.  Slashers from the 80s was known for having the cast ham it up on camera but Terrifier didn't come off as campy or cheesy like these films.  However, it just doesn't work with this film.  The story for this one sounds like a fantastic slasher on paper but once filmed is just bland.  The viewer does not get enough substance with this slasher and for a feature length film the story is just stretch way too far.  You could cut 30 minutes out of this one easily and make it a more fluid viewing experience.  Finally, the film is a visual feast in regards to on screen kills and gore.  The kills are fucking brutal and the gore looks great.  This is some of the best practical effects I think I've seen all year.  Overall, Terrifier is a horror flick that I am sad to say is just a middle of the road horror flick.  The gore and amazing but the story, acting, and running time just works against it.  It reminded me a lot of The Orphan Killer that suffered the same fate.  I can recommend this one for a one time viewing just to see the gore but the film as a whole is a huge let down. 
 



All Hallow's Eve 2

Director(s) - Bryan Norton (Penny Dreadful, Seven Hells), Jesse Baget (Zombieworld, El Mascarado Massacre), Andres Borghi (Necropolis, Fear Haus), Jay Holben (The Invoking 2, The Night Before), Mike Kochansky (Heaven: Hell, This or the Apocalypse), James Kondelik (Jurassic Galaxy, Dam Sharks), Jon Kondelik (Artic Apocalypse, Hornet), Antonio Padovan (Galaxy of Horrors, Tillman), Ryan Patch (Darkroom, The Offering), Marc Roussel (Sweet Tooth, Dark Web)
Starring - Andrea Monier (Day of the Mummy, The Black Water Vampire), Damien Monier (Grim), and Helen Rogers (V/H/S, Psychopaths)
Release Date - 2015
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Don't answer the door"
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     Halloween has taken a deep dark turn for me.  So far this October has been the most memorable for me in recent years after I decided to binge as many horror films as possible this month.  I hit my first speed bump with the Hong Kong horror flick The Lingering and then went full speed into a wall with All Hallow's Eve.  All Hallow's Eve 2 was up on deck so my month was not going to be taking a turn for the better any time soon until I finished this anthology.
     The film follows a woman who finds a VHS on her doorstep and decides to give it a go.  We then follow her through several shorts.  The first follows a woman and her son who are roasting pumpkin seeds.  They enjoy a few and then something tragic.  The second tale follows a man and woman living in their home barricaded from the harsh post-apocalyptic environment outside when they receive some unusual trick or treaters.  The third tale follows a father and son duo that are short on their offering in the woods for a benevolent creature in the woods.  The fourth follows a young boy who is afraid of the monster under the bed and this time there might actually be something there.  The fifth tale follows a young woman who witnesses a murder and some time later she finds herself face to face with the killer...or is she?  The sixth tale follows a group of teens that arrive at a carnival with an unusual game laid before them.  The seventh tale follows a man who wants to have the most authentic Halloween decorations and will stop at nothing to achieve this.  The eight and final tale follows a young man who lost his girlfriend sometime ago.  When he tries to move on her social media accounts become sentient and don't like being deleted.
     All Hallow's Eve 2 is a little better than the first film but that's not saying much.  A few of the segments are fantastic but the overall film is still a challenge to finish.  Luckily, the acting in this one is a little better than the previous installment but the segments were not consistent.  Some of the shorts does have a better cast than others but they are all still solid.  The stories for this one are inconsistent as well but that's expected from anthologies with such a wide range of directors.  The film starts off extremely fucking strong with the best segment in the film and then the film dwindles out from there.  The Late Halloween segment is fun as well but does take a dark and bleak story and makes it end on a goofy note.  The rest of the movie is a struggle to finish.  Finally, the film has several scenes with great practical effects.  The first short has some decent gore and great practical effects and the remainder of the film was decent as well but the stories lack entertainment value and the effects was wasted.  Overall, All Hallow's Eve 2 is a little better than it's predecessor but still a huge waste of time.  I recommend skipping on this one.

All Hallow's Eve

Director - Damien Leone (Terrifier, Frankenstein vs. Mummy)
Starring - Katie Maguire (Gold Star, Search Party), Catherine A. Callahan (30 Rock, All My Children), and Marie Maser (Terrifier)
Release Date - 2013
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Come out and play"
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     It's almost daily that I'm reminded about how strange and unusual my tastes in movies are.  Several years ago I was browsing movies at Wal-Mart in October when I came across the DVD for the horror anthology All Hallow's Eve.  The movie looked painfully generic but I grabbed it anyway. A few years later I picked up the sequel as well on DVD but never got around to watching it. After all the hype last year with Terrifier, the spinoff from the first film, I thought I would give these films a shot with Halloween approaching.  Boy, I wish I would have fucking went with another movie.
     The film begins with a babysitter and the two children she is watching as they explore their Halloween treats they got from trick or treating when one of them spots a VHS without a label.  She doesn't want the kids to see what's on it before they watch it.  She tosses it in and is greeted with a story about a girl who is abducted by a clown and taken somewhere where there is other women in chains.  They try to escape but find some far more menacing than the clown.  The second tale follows a young woman who is unpacking in her new home when something sounds like it has crashed nearby.  She frantically looks and soon finds herself face to face with something out of this world.  The third and final tale follows a woman as she is stalked and terrorized by the clown from the first segment.
     I went into this one after hearing it's praises for years.  So many horror fans proclaim this as their favorite Halloween movies and many more have included it in their annual Halloween viewing.  However, after throwing it in I'm curious if my blu of the film is different than what everyone else is watching because this was one of the worst movie experiences I have seen in recent years.  It took me two days to finish it.  The acting in this one is my biggest turn off.  The cast is just spitting out dialogue with no conviction or dedication to their role.  When I started the first segment I had to turn it off after a few moments because I was laughing at the cast.  The stories for this one are interesting to say the least but their execution and pacing is just wrong.  The first segment is very cliched, predictable, and boring but the second story was out of place but interesting.  I was not expecting an alien tale in the middle of a Halloween movie but I actually enjoyed it.  The third segment would have been my favorite but the slow pacing and lack of suspense really made it not as enjoyable as it could be.  Finally, the film has some solid practical effects but the viewer pays little attention to them by that point because they are waiting for the film to end.  I feel that if these effects were in a better film you would remember them for years to come but because of how bland this film is the viewer will not remember these come several weeks from now.  Overall, All Hallow's Eve was the biggest disappointment of the Halloween season. I know I said that earlier with The Lingering but this film surpasses that.  If you like this movie then good for you but nothing you say will change my mind about this one.  Skip it.

Artik

Director - Tom Botchii Skowronski (Novak, 11 Minutes)
Starring - Chase Williamson (John Dies at the End, Beyond the Gates), Jerry G. Angelo (Better Call Saul, Road Wars), and Gavin White (The Reunion, 14 Camera)
Release Date - 2019
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Release the purity within"
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     My October horror binge is still in full force.  This month I've seen some awesome movies along with a few duds.  None of the film was a stinker like The Lingering and I hope I don't come across another like it the remainder of the month.  I wanted to once again dive into a movie I had never seen before and only recently received the newest Epic Pictures release of Artik.  The movie looked interesting but I didn't know enough about the film to make assumptions before tossing it in.  I want to thank Epic Pictures for sending this one over for me to check out.
     The film follows an unusual family consisting of a serial killer father (Angelo), a backwards mother, and their gang of kids.  One day one of their boys meets a straight edge man (Williamson) at a AA meeting. He befriends him and soon the man realizes that the kids is not being taken care of.  The boy's father suspects something is going on and kidnaps the man to torture and kill but he is able to break free with the help of the abused kids.  After a game of cat and mouse the serial killer finds himself on the opposite side for once.
    I have a bad habit of letting a movie's artwork determine my excitement for a new movie I've never seen before.  I know I'm not alone but I often get excited for a movie if the artwork is colorful or fun.  Sadly, a lot of the time the artwork is better than the movie and the same can be said the other way around.  I lost count how many movies had shitty artwork that were actually pretty fucking good.  Artik is one of those movies.  Think back to the video store days and how you would more than likely skip this release if you saw the poster above sitting on the shelf.  I'm glad I gave the film a chance because I actually liked it.  The acting in this one is fucking fantastic.  I absolutely loved the cast.  Chase Williamson is a phenomenal actor that just doesn't get enough roles.  I loved his character in the film though I could have lived without the whole straight edge part.  I have always found that to be kind of weird.  I also really enjoyed  Jerry G. Angelo performance.  I loved the complexity of his character and the personality he portrayed.  The supporting cast is solid but their characters don't stand out like these two.  The story for this one starts out very dry and slow paced but by the 45 minute mark we find the film picking up momentum which saves it.  Once we get to the point the film is energetic and highly entertaining.  If you stick with it you will enjoy the ride.  Finally, we do get some pretty brutal practical effects and kills but there is a spot or two with extremely noticeable visual effects that stick out from the rest of the gag.  It does cheapen these kills but not enough to ruin the film.  Overall, Artik starts out slow but ends with a bang.  The story is interesting without being overly complicated and the acting is top notch.  Check it out.  

The Lingering

Director(s) - Ho Pong Mak and Derrick Tao
Starring - Bob Yin-Pok Cheung (House of Spirits, When Heaven Burns), Kai-Chung Cheung (Zombiology: Enjoy Yourself Tonight, Keeper of Darkness), and Athena Chu (Supercop 2, The Legend of the Condor Heroes)
Release - 2018
Genre - Horror
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     This has been the most entertaining October I've had in a long ass time.  I've been binging horror movies and I made a rule that most of the films I watch this month be first time watches.  I've seen some great anthologies, a couple slashers, some horror comedies, and even a found footage flick but I have yet to see a genuine supernatural film.  A few weeks ago I was sent a press release from Well Go U.S. for the 2018 Hong Kong horror film The Lingering.  After watching a few great horror anthologies I decided it was time to toss this one in.  I know my tastes in foreign horror is different but this was one I just couldn't get into.

    The film begins with a mother and her son as they wait for her husband to arrive but he never does.  Her son has been seeing something strange around the home in his absence and often tells her that he is playing hide and seek with uncle but he has no uncle.  After sometime she visits his place of work and discovers that his poor decision cost him life along with the rest of his crew.  we move forward and the boy is now a man with a very successful restaurant.  He gets a call that his mom is missing and he refuses to show sympathy but later receives a call that she has died.  He goes to identify the body and is given an offer by a real estate agent to buy her property.  While searching the home for the deed he starts to encounter the same strange happenings he once did during his childhood.

     I wanted to like this one.  I really enjoyed the artwork for this one but I cant find anything enjoyable about this one.  The movie was a huge time waster and extremely difficult to sit through.  The acting in this one is solid but the characters are painfully bland.  They have no personalities and you make no real connection with any of the characters which makes it difficult to want to follow the story if you don't care for the people.  The story for this one is more a supernatural drama rather than a paranormal horror movie.  The main focus of the movie is the main character's business prospect and making enough money to cover opening a chain of restaurants.  I don't know about you but as a middle class man working payday to payday I dislike watching movies where the main focus is making money in the amount that this dude does.  Aside from that, the movie is extremely boring.  I found myself drifting off to sleep several times.  Finally, no blood or gore here.  In fact, no real chills either.  The film has no atmosphere or tension with the story just rolling through with nothing to pull the viewer in.  Overall, The Lingering is the biggest bust of October for me.  I wanted to like it but it didn't give me a chance.  Skip it.  

Weird Fiction

Director - Jacob Perrett (Spine Chiller)
Starring - Taylor Rhoades (Spine Chiller), Isabella Rodriguez (Spine Chiller), and Mackenzie Anthony
Release Date - 2018
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Four tales of true terror"
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     God damn I love Halloween.  I haven't got to really enjoy the holiday that much as an adult because of work and other bullshit.  Sure, I watch horror movies in abundance during October but I never really get to enjoy the holiday.  That changed this year.  My kids are now old enough to get into the Halloween season and this year I've got back into the spirit.  With Halloween just a few more days away I wanted to check out a few Halloween horror flicks.  I went ahead and turned on one I've been meaning to check out for a few days now from the team behind Spine Chiller that I recently reviewed.  Weird Fiction is a Halloween anthology from 2018 that will be finding distribution very soon.  Thank you Taylor for sending this one my way.
     The film follows a man telling stories to his audience.  The first story follows a group of kids who pick up a young woman who tells them she knows where a dead body is.  Their curiosity gets the best of them but they soon realize there is more to the story than they thought.  The second story follows a guy who is babysitter a woman's brother in return for sexual favors but their night doesn't go according to plan when something sinister lurks within the home.  The third story follows an adult film star who finds a set of puncture wounds on his neck after working with a woman on set.  Soon he finds his appetite changing and the sun is becomes more harsh on his body.  The fourth and final story follows a young woman who finds an alien and takes him in but soon the aliens true intentions are revealed.
     I went into this one high from watching Spine Chillers which is one of the catalysts behind my new found love for Halloween but I wasn't expecting that same feeling.  The anthology is a little older and from my understand it was one of their first few attempts at filmmaking.  They created a very solid anthology but the film itself doesn't capture that Halloween feel like Spine Chillers.  The acting in this one is very amateur but it's still entertaining.  The cast dedicates their all to the role and it works.  There is a few scenes that their inexperience shows but it doesn't pull away from the whole film.  A good portion of the cast moved on to Spine Chillers and you can see the growth between the two films.  The stories for these work for an anthology but it doesn't really bring that Fall/Halloween feel.  I don't know if the intentions of this anthology is to be a Halloween film or just a horror film that was first released around Halloween but the Halloween aspect is not there.  Aside from that, I really enjoyed the segments and the wraparound segment tying them all together.  It brought this Tales from the Crypt type feel to the film.  Finally, the film isn't what I would call gory but it has some blood in the film and one or two pretty fucking solid practical effects gags.  The film focuses more on horror and suspense rather than gore.  Overall, Weird Fiction is another fun anthology that has some heart and solid storytelling.  I highly recommend this little slice of horror fun.

     

10/31 Part 2

Director(s) - Jennifer Nangle (Spirit Board, Dare You), Tory van Buskirk (Come to Me Sister Mary, Alone), Stephen Wolfe (Dacula's Coffin, Doll Factory), Max Groah (Never Say Dead, Carpool), and Drew Marvick (Scared to Death, Pool Party Massacre)
Starring - London Grace (The White Witch, Ghosthunters), Jennifer Nangle, and R.J. Wagner (Terror Tales, Hans Crippleton: Talks to the Hans)
Release Date - 2019
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "More blood soaked tales of horror and the macabre"
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Halloween is fast approaching and this is the most excited I've been for the holiday in sometime.  I've watched so many horror movies this month getting in the holiday spirit but with Halloween just around the corner I want to switch gears and check out some Halloween flicks.  Last year I watched the horror anthology 10/31 produced by Rocky Gray with segments directed by several amazing filmmakers.  The film was perfect for the Halloween season but the film was rather forgettable.  A few days back I was tagged in a post on Facebook by a friend.  Rocky was looking for reviewers to check out his follow up 10/31 Part 2.  Thanks Rocky for allowing me the opportunity to check this one out!

     The film begins with Malvolia who tells us the stories we are about to watch.  The first, A Samhain Liturgy, follows a babysitter who is watching a little boy on Halloween.  She sneaks her boyfriend over and find something unnatural living in the basement.  When they investigate they find themselves in the middle of a cult with their blood on the menu.  The second tale, Dead Lift, follows an Uber-like driver waiting for his next fair on Halloween night when a man dressed like a vampire approaches him.  What happens next is anything but your typical vampire tale.  The third, Apache Hatchet Massacre II (not a tomahawk but a hatchet), follows a group of party goers celebrating Halloween when they meet a gruesome end from a hatchet wielding maniac.  The fourth tale, Overkill, follows a masked wielding maniac stacking up the body count on Halloween when he spots his next victim.  However, he is not the only killer walking the streets.  The final tale, Sister Mary, follows a nun with a different past who has to deal with her own demons on Halloween.

     Halloween anthologies are the backbone of any Halloween viewing.  Most people toss in classic like Creepshow, Trick 'r Treat, and even All Hallow's Eve to an extent so I'm always open to check out a new anthology.  10/31, as I said earlier, was a fun movie but one you won't remember from Halloween to Halloween.  10/31 Part 2 once again delivers a Halloween filled fun anthology but some of the segments are not consistent.  The acting in this one is one of the few aspects of the film that is consistent.  Every segment is fairly well acted but some do have a little more entertaining characters than others.  The cast in each segment do a fantastic job portraying their characters and they move the stories along nicely.  The stories for this one is the biggest inconsistency of the film.  What makes anthologies so much fun is the wraparound segments.  These segments hold the whole film together while offering a nice and neat bookend to the film when everything is said and done.  I wasn't digging the horror host angle of the Malvolia: Queen of Screams wraparound.  It would have worked if the character had more personality like Elvira or Sister Sadie Safeword but she didn't.  Her segments just played through but they don't really pull the viewer in.  The first segment does a great job kicking the film off.  I really enjoy movies centered around Satanic or Pagan cults and this one was really fun.  In fact, I really wish it was a little longer.  The second tale, Dead Lift, was decent and an interesting story but the pacing of the segment was a little on the slow side which threw the anthology off beat somewhat.  Don't let the slow moving short fool you though.  It's enjoyable if you stick with it.  The third segment, Apache Hatchet Massacre II, is the shortest segment in the film and possibly one of the weakest.  With that being said, it does have the more memorable characters in the film.  It just feels underdeveloped and rushed.  The next segment, Overkill, is the highlight of the film.  The story is so damn entertaining and can be expanded upon in so many way.  Director Drew Marvick needs to give us more of this.  The final segment, Sister Mary, was the low point in the film to me.  The short has a decent story but the way it is told on camera makes for a bit of a boring experience.  Finally, if you want some blood you will find it here.  Each segment stands on their own in very different ways.  Some of the shorts are much more bloodier than the others but amazing practical effects can be seen pretty much throughout.  I really enjoyed the quality of carnage the film brought.  Overall, 10/31 Part 2 is another worthy Halloween horror film that should be added to your seasonal movie rotation.  One segment stands above the rest but the whole movie as a whole is enjoyable.  I highly recommend checking this one out this Halloween season.  

Dead Residence



Director - Sean Donohue (Death-Scort Service, The Hart-Break Killer)
Starring - Arius West (The Curious Case of Jeff Jefferson), Kylie Remlinger, and Martin Grobisen (Seeing Red, If I Can't Have You...)
Release Date - 2019
Genre - Horror
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Halloween is quickly approaching and I'm spending all my free time watching as many horror movies as possible.  So far this month I'm up to 37 written reviews with 39 movies watched.  I'm pretty sure this is the most I've watched in half a month.  As I dive deeper and deeper into October I find myself checking out some pretty cool indie horror flicks that I had never seen before.  A few days back director Sean Donohue of Gatorblade Films reached out to me to check out his newest film Dead Residence.  Sean is a director I greatly admire and I could never turn down one of his films.  Thanks Sean for reaching out to me to check this one out!

     The film follows a young couple who are ready to buy their own house.  They do some looking online and find the perfect fixer upper in their price range.  They contact the realtor and meet him in the home.  The look it over and fall in love with it.  Before long they are moving in with grand dreams of fixing it up for their own.  Things take a dark twist that night when the security camera spots someone prowling the property.  Soon their ideal home is looking for like a home that a squatter was hiding in and matter take an even more gruesome turn when a flash drive with videos of people being tortured in that very home.  When the realtor refuses to return their calls they are soon face to face with the mysterious man and they become the stars of his newest video.

     I hate when a filmmaker that I've made friends with over the years sends me something to review and I don't like it.  I always feel like I'm being a dick but the harsh truth is a filmmaker will never knock it out of the park 100% of the time.  Remember, Romero had Bruiser.  Dead Residence is NOT a bad movie but it is a movie I just couldn't get behind.  The acting in this one is decent for the most part but the cast does have some room to grow.  The characters are extremely cliched but they fit the found footage theme of the film.  The story for this one would be fucking amazing as a straight forward horror film but told in the found footage manner it loses it's impact.  The killer living in the attack killing everyone that moves in is fucking creepy as fuck and uses real life horrors to work.  With that being said, the impact is lost when we watch the two stars of the film small talk for 45 minutes or longer before we get to the good stuff.  The story is extremely drawn out which will try your patience.  Finally, the film isn't as bloody as you come to expect from Donohue and company but we do get a few scenes where we get some blood.  The effects are minimal but do work in the found footage favor.  Overall, Dead Residence isn't a film for me but I'll be the first to admit that I'm not a fan of found footage.  The movie has a story that could work and the movie is pieced together in a manner that if you liked found footage flicks you would enjoy but it just wasn't for me.