Silent Retreat

Director - Tricia Lee (One Drop)
Starring - Chelsea Jenish (Motives and Murders: Cracking the Case), Sofia Banzhaf (Closet Monster), and Robert Nolan (The Resurrection of Clarence Neveldine)
Release - 2013
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "The rules are simple"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     One horror sub-genre that does not get the credit that it deserves is the creature feature or monster movies.  These films, at one time, ruled the horror genre and became synonymous for what the genre is capable of.  Sadly, horror has taken a more realistic approach and centers mostly on serial killers, rapists, mass murderers, and slashers.  This has forever changed horror and put the monster movies in the backseat while these other films reign.  To make matters worse, when a good monster movie is released they package it in such a way that the viewer will never know it's a monster flick unless they buy it and watch it.  Case in point, Silent Retreat.  The film's cover art made me think this was a blood soaked "kids in the woods" type horror flick but I quickly realized it was not when I threw it in.

     The film follows a group of troubled youths (all female) that are sent to a secluded camp in the woods for meditation and healing.  Here they are supervised and watched over by a mysterious doctor and his drones that try to keep the women in line.  However, if they continue to misbehave and act out, they are not sent to jail.  They are actually bound and taken into the woods.  Janey (Jenish) is an unruly patient and the good doctor takes her into the woods and ties her to a tree.  She hears noises and attempts to break free.  As the noise draws near she is able to escape and make her way back to the mess hall where it follows.  The beast enters the mess hall and begins killing the girls before we learn that the doctor is able to control the beast and uses it as a way to curb his patients.  Janey is able to turn the tide and send the beast on a bloody rampage ending with the death of the doctor.

     Modern horror flicks go for the shock factor instead of quality.  Most want to disgust the viewer to the point they turn it off and exclaim at the horror.  However, what results is a cheap film with no story or a weak one at best.  That is one of the reasons I miss the golden age of monster movies where the viewer knew exactly what they were getting themselves into.  If the story was weak then they at least got a fun or cheesy monster out of it.  Silent Retreat is a well welcomed monster flick that hides the fact very well.  Almost too well.  Before I watched this film I had no idea this would be a creature feature which resulted in a very pleasant surprise.  With that being said, if people just look at the cover they would never know this film was, in fact, a monster flick.  The acting in this one is hit or miss.  The entire cast has a great deal of talent in front of the camera but they sometimes have a hard time interacting with other characters.  Almost all the character interactions seem forced and awkward.  This is one of the few instances where a few rehearsals would have went a long way among the cast.  The story for this one is not that original but it was done in a manner we are not used to seeing.  The film starts out making you think it is going to be another psychological thriller centered around a group of unstable women.  We are then tossed in a "cabin in the woods" scenario where we are tricked into believing that an evil doctor is behind the real horror in the film only to discover that an evil beast (similar to the creatures in The Descent) is stalking and murdering young girls for the doctor before turning it's sights on him.  This is a great story that has the potential to be a classic but the film is brought down by unnecessary dialogue and scenes that drag on for far too long.  Finally, the film has several great kill scenes with amazing gore.  We are also treated to some amazing practical effects that make the kills even more gruesome.  Overall, Silent Retreat is a bloody monster film for the gore hounds out there.  Fans of The Decent should really check this one out!  

The Hornet's Sting and the Hell It's Caused

Director - Dustin Mills (Kill That Bitch, Snuffet)
Starring - Joni Durian (Haunted House on Sorority Row), Allison Egan (Skinless), and Minnie Grey (Easter Casket)
Release Date - 2014
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Kidnapped. Humiliated. De-humanized"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     Director Dustin Mills is an indie force like no other releasing amazing film after amazing film. His film's single-handedly changed the way I look, not just indie horror, but indie cinema as a whole.   He has shown time and time again that budget does not dictate talent by releasing films that are not only entertaining but they are also visually stunning.  If you have not seen Bath Salt Zombies, Kill That Bitch, and Easter Casket then I suggest you stop reading this review and check them out as soon as possible.  Last year Mills announced he was starting a second production company that would feature films that were a lot darker and visceral.  This second production company, Crumpleshack Films, has released several underground horror hits like Her Name Was Torment and Snuffet.  Towards the end of last year Mills released The Hornet's Sting and the Hell It's Caused and I was unable to land myself a copy until now.  

     The film follows photographer Rose (Grey).  Rose specializes in bondage photography with clients spread out all over the world, however, her bondage specialty does not end with ball-gags and handcuffs.  Her photographs depict models that are forced to model nude and then they are tortured and eventually murdered for her clientele.  Rose meets a beautiful young lady named Freya (Durian) who is a closeted lesbian looking to hook up.  Rose strips her down and ties her up before she tortures her a little.  Rose stops the torture to answer an important business phone call before she returns to finish her photo shoot but Freya is a survivor and refuses to die easily.  She chews off her finger and when Rose returns she attacks her and puts the sadistic beauty to death. 

     One of the many things that I love about a Mills' flick is that the cinematography is always beautiful.  Each film, regardless of how graphic and gory, is always beautifully shot and choreographed resulting in films that are nothing less that modern art.  THSatHiC is another moving masterpiece from the mind of Mills' that will not be forgotten anytime soon.  The acting in this one is very intense even compared to the other films from the mind of Mills.  The victims, many nameless with no real back story given, are all portrayed perfectly by an amazing cast consisting on indie royalty and Mills' regulars.  Joni Durian, Allison Egan, Minnie Grey, and Dave Parker have been in several other Mills' films and have made a name for themselves among the horror community and this film clearly shows why Mills continues to cast them in his flicks.  Each cast member went above and beyond to make their roles believable and it shows.  It is also amazing how demanding their roles were and how they all were able to stay in character.  Major kudos to this cast.  The story for this one is a little less detailed than what we are accustomed to coming from Mills.  The story of a young bondage photographer torturing and killing for profit and sexual desire is rather flat but that does not make it less as disturbing.  The film, in the world of horror, is not that original but it is the first I have seen for a very long time that jolted a nerve.  Very few filmmakers can take a story and add so much dimension and tension to a scene and Mills has that down perfectly.  Finally, the film does feature several on screen kills but they are nothing that bloody and memorably.  The point of this film is to not show explicit scenes of torture and gore, but to give the viewer a beautiful film that has beautiful women in situations that are considered taboo by the masses.  The film also features some great practical effects.  Overall, The Hornet's Sting and the Hell It's Caused is another superb film from indie filmmaker Dustin Mills. The film is unnerving, sexy, and beautifully shot.  The story is weak but Mills makes up for it with a great dialogue and tension.  Check this one out!

The Walking Deceased

Director - Scott Dow (Taste Buddies)
Starring - Tim Ogletree (Supernatural Activity), Joey Oglesby (Supernatural Activity), and Dave Sheridan (The Devil's Rejects)
Release Date - 2015
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "Imagine a world where the dead are smarter than the living" and "A comedy with bite"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I'm a sucker for a good spoof which is evident in all the horror porn parodies that I review.  I like spoofs for a different reason than why I like remakes and sequels.  Remakes and sequels continue a story that I know and love or give me a new spin on a classic tale.  However, a spoof will take a story that I like and make fun of it.  Sure, most of these are cheap and shitty in comparison but they are still fun for at least one viewing.  Recently, I caught wind that there was an upcoming spoof of The Walking Dead.  I mention The Walking Dead a lot because the story spawned hundreds of zombie flicks but none have attempted to parody it unless you include Burning Angel's The Walking Dead Hardcore Parody.  Anyway, this upcoming parody, cleverly titled The Walking Deceased, caught my attention not only because I am a fan of spoofs, but because I am still a Walking Dead fan even though the show has ruined the current state of zombie films.  I reached out to the folks behind the film and they were kind enough to hook me up with a review copy.

     The film follows Sheriff Lincoln (Sheridan) as he wakes up in the hospital 29 days after a zombie outbreak.  As he awakens he meets two survivors named Green Bay and Chicago who are searching for supplies in the hospital. The three team up to head back to the mall where more survivors are held up.  We are also introduced to a zombie with a conscience named Romeo who falls in love with  a young girl accompanying Green Bay and Chicago.   He shambles after them as they head back to the mall to regroup.  Sadly, he brings with him a horde of the undead and they are able to get into the mall.  He stops the undead from getting her and she falls in love with him unaware that he is a zombie.  They leave the mall and find their way to a farm where the apocalypse has not touched it.  They are able to find refuge there but the undead soon find them and they are once again forced to fight for their lives but before long a cure is found.
     Spoofs are usually fun for a cheap laugh and unexpected humor but they usually never have any replay value.  The Walking Deceased is no different.  The film does offer up several cheap laughs and a few surprises along the way.  The acting is nothing that special and at times it feels like a chore to watch when there is no jokes taking place.  The characters are flat and most are almost impossible to like but Dave Sheridan's character brought a lot of humor to the film.  The story for this one is exactly as you think it is.  The film follows the first episode of The Walking Dead but tosses in several other popular zombie films that caught me off guard.  We are first given a nod to 28 Days Later before we are given parodies to Shaun of the Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Zombieland. Warm Bodies, and several others.  I assumed this film would only parody TWD but these other parodies and homages was a very nice touch that added some excitement and more horror related jokes for the horror fan.  Finally, the film did have a couple gory kills but they are done just off center of film and the viewer does not get to really enjoy them and the practical effects that went into them.  The film was intended to be a comedy more than a horror flick and that will turn off any horror fan looking for zombie carnage.  Overall, The Walking Deceased is a fun film that has a few genuine laughs but has no replay value and an unlikable cast.  Check it out because it deserves at least one viewing.

Invasion of the Undead

Director - Torey Haas (Jack and Julie vs. The Boogeyman)
Starring - Marie Barker (Horror Hotel Web Series), Greg Garrison (Dekiru: The Three Stones), and D. Dylan Schettina (Footloose)
Release Date - 2015
Genre - Horror/Sci-Fi
Tagline - "A grin from fear to fear"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Zombies and the undead are what is popular right now so no amount of bitching and complaining is going to make them stop.  Before this current zombie apocalypse fad I was a huge fan of the sub-genre and would often grab any zombie flick I could get my chubby fingers on.  That has changed with the rise of all the Walking Dead rip-offs.  I wouldn't mind it as much if they would just try to give me a different take on the zombie mythos instead of giving me the same story I watch every Sunday when I watch TWD.  A few months back I received a press release for the indie horror flick Invasion of the Undead.  I saw the trailer and poster and was mesmerized by it.  I reached out to the director Torey Haas and he was kind enough to shoot me a review copy of the film when it was finished.  Thanks Torey.  

     The film follows a young woman living in a remote home by herself when she discovers a zombie in her home.  She tells a girl scout and she has the young woman call two video store clerks who are known for defeating the supernatural.  The two arrive and are able to defeat the undead pretty easily but quickly uncover a deep, dark secret involving the home and an ancient evil.

     What makes all these zombie films so boring is that they all follow the same stories with no hint of originality.  All these lackluster flicks pit a group of survivors against a world overrun by the undead.  I am compelled to watch any film that I find that has nothing to do with this story line and still features zombies,  That is another reason I was pulled into IotU.  The story did not follow the zombie mythos the way we know them today.  In fact, the film follows a more traditional sense of the zombie mythos.  The acting in this film is fun and the cast really brings their characters to life.  Every character was cast perfectly and every cast member gave it their all to get into their role.  This is evident by how fun the film is.  The story for this one is a different take on the zombie sub-genre.  The film makes you think that it is going to go the tradition zombie path with roots in voodoo.  However, they quickly change it up and instead of the undead being controlled by a human, we quickly learn that something much darker is controlling them.  This was a great story that could spawn a series of films and even a few comics.  Finally, the film is overflowing with practical and visual effects.  The film showcases decent practical effects in several different forms.  We get a few great puppets and practical effects that are combined with some great visual effects to create one visually pleasing horror film.  Overall, Invasion of the Undead is a blast.  This is the most fun I have had with a movie in a long time.   The characters are enjoyable, the effects are on point, and the story is awesome.  Check this one out as soon as possible.

Franklin: A Symphony of Pain

Director - Jeremy Westrate (Magnum Opus)
Starring - Nikolas Franklin (Spare Change), Greg G. Freeman (Dangerous People), and Slake Counts (Joe Vampire)
Release Date - 2014
Genre - Thriller
Tagline - "A mind is a beautiful thing to waste"
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     People love to bitch and and no one likes to bitch more than horror fans.  They search out any and everything they can and bitch and moan online and in public forums because they have nothing better to do.  They mostly shit talk remakes and sequels because they lack the thought processes to look outside the picture and see that these are just continuations of films we already love.  However, while they are bitching they are letting original films slip through the cracks.  Recently, writer, director, and producer Sean Donohue reached out to me to check out a film he wrote and produced.  The film, Franklin: A Symphony of Pain, was one that I had never heard of before.  I was curious and he was nice enough to send me a review copy of the film. Sadly, wok has got the best of me and it took me a little longer than usual to get the review up.  Thanks for letting me check it out Sean and I apologize it took so long for me get it up for you!
     The film follows an unlucky individual named Franklin (Nikolas Franklin) as he ventures out to explore nature for a bit.  However, his little stroll does not go according to plan.  He is abducted by a group of mask wearing psychos that torture and rape him for several days.  They finally let him go but his torment is far from over.  He comes across another group of psychos that kick the shit out of him before he is able run away.  He then comes across a twisted priest and is forced to relive those painful moments before learning who he really is.
     Films don't really need an elaborate story to entertain the viewer.  The film itself needs the power to entertain the viewer as long as the story is easily visible.  Franklin: A Symphony of Pain gave the viewer a very simple story but went about it in a unconventional manner.  The acting in this one is great but it goes unnoticed due to the way the film is shot.  The entire cast was phenomenal.  The masked characters never break their character and that adds a lot the atmosphere of the film.  Nikolas Franklin is a great lead and the viewer really starts to feel for him after he continuously is shit on.  The story for this one is simple. effective, and trippy as fuck.  We have a story that follows a young man and his shitty luck as we watch him get the shit kicked out of him numerous times.  This reminded me a lot of the adventure comedy Frankie in Blunderland but the film did not go the Troma-esque route like FiB did.  Instead, it takes a more macabre route and really inflicts pain on the poor boy.  Also, the story does not unfold like a typical film.  Instead, we are given beautiful cinematography detailing a small portion of the story at a time before it is split up with psychedelic imagery that puts the viewer in the middle of an acid trip in hell.  I loved the story and how it was delivered.  Finally, the film does have several on screen kills that are gruesome and bloody with solid practical effects to pull them off.  Overall, Franklin: A Symphony of Pain is pure madness on film.  The film is unnerving and disgusting at times.  Check it out!