The Battery (2012)



The Battery (2012)
directed by:  Jeremy Gardner
starring:  Jeremy Gardner, Adam Cronheim, Niels Bolle, Alana O'Brien, Larry Fessenden
format:  NTSC:  Region 1 Blu-Ray
tagline:  In a world ravaged by the undead Ben and Mickey must learn to survive...each other.

(out of 5)



The Movie:  Yeah another zombie movie!  Damn right.  As long as they are good I don't care how many they make.  The Battery was said to bring something new to the zombie genre.  Maybe this was a trick to bring in the haters or maybe I've just seen a lot of zombie movies either way this was nothing new to me.  Hardly any zombies and more human condition is possibly what these articles or reviews meant that I read but I just think of Dead Weight and others like that.  The Battery is kind of a hipsters zombie movie and that's a fun way to think of it.  Dragged a little bit in the end but this was a thumbs up movie for me.  The shots in this movie alone are worth the watch.  We have a nice abandoned factory shot, a waterfall, the picture below of the two men lying in a circular rock formation it's just very well photographed by Christian Stella.



The Script:  Ben (Jeremy Garnder)and Mickey (Adam Cronheim) are out in the world which is overrun with zombies.  They barely know each other but played baseball together as pitcher and catcher.  The entire film is them fighting, talking, interacting in a variety of situations including Ben forcing Mickey to kill his first zombie.  I found nothing unbelievable or hokey in the dialogue and very much enjoyed both characters even though I did find Mickey's weakness to be annoying given their situation.  But then the film would not have the dynamic between the two opposite characters it had.

The Gore:  In comparison to a lot of zombie films there really wasn't much but this was not the balls out gut munching fest and that didn't make it bad.  At least not for me.  Gore is HUGE with me I'm definitely a gorehound but it isn't necessary all the time.  Would I have liked to see a good gut-munching scene in this?  For sure but I'm fine with the way it was.

The Acting:  Loved both Jeremy Gardner and Adam Cronheim.  Their relationship in the film was very natural as was their acting overall.  Acting can really make or break a film and this one was really made by it considering their camera time.  A side note Larry Fessenden makes a cameo appearance which is always nice.

The Rating:  Four Bloody Handprints mostly because of the dragging end and after you see the film I'm pretty sure you'll agree.  I love slow paced dramas and all but sometimes you just have to pick it up somehow.  Kind of lost me there.  Overall great movie and I'll be rewatching for sure.

Bombshell Bloodbath

Director - Brett Mullen (Beneath the Old Dark House)
Starring - Alex Elliott (Night of the Living Dead: Genesis), Ed Ricker (Under the Dome), and Rob Springer (The Taking of Deborah Morgan)
Release Date - 2014
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Just a chemical reaction"
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     What can I say about zombies that I haven't already said in my last 10 or so reviews that belonged to that particular sub-genre.  That sub-genre is on fire at the moment and I blame The Walking Dead and the amazing success of the show for the current surplus of zombie flicks.  All these zombie flicks has actually left a bad taste in my mouth.  However, I still come across one here and there that looks so fucking awesome that I have to check it out.  Early last year I came across the film Bombshell Bloodbath on Facebook.  I reached out to the page and never received a reply.  I soon forgot about the film until recently when I saw several reviews pop up for it.  I reached out to the page again and they were kind enough to send me a link to the online screener.  Thanks guys!

     The film follows a deranged scientist who is working tirelessly on a serum to resurrect the dead.  He lost his wife sometime ago and wants nothing more than to bring her back to life.  He has been stealing corpses from the graveyard to fuel his research and finally succeeds at bringing the dead back to life.  However, they are void of all conscience and have an insatiable appetite for human flesh.  One of his test corpses bites him on the face before he is able to kill it.  This brings him closer to bringing his wife back but he is now forced to wear a wrap around his face Darkman style.  His work is close to home and he accidentally infects his daughter who is now brought in the middle of an isolated zombie epidemic while she searches for a cure.

     We are in a time where almost every zombie film attempts to recapture all the elements that make The Walking Dead so enjoyable every Sunday with most of them failing to do so.  With that being said, we do get some that are inspired by other zombie films that have nothing to do with TWD and it makes them seem almost original or at least original by comparison.  That is what Bombshell Bloodbath was able to do.  It gave us a story we have seen several times before TWD but one that is almost non-existent in the post-TWD zombie sub-genre.  This made the film fun and made me almost love zombies again.  The acting in this one is fun which is something I don't think I have ever said before when reviewing a zombie flick.  The cast really got into their roles and it made each scene fun and really enjoyable.  It is rare you come across cast members that work so well together.  That helped this film out tremendously.  The story for this one is one I have seen several times before.  A scientist working on a way to bring the dead back life has been seen in the films Re-Animator and The Rage.  These are fun stories that take the zombies away from the zombie apocalypse and puts them in the hands of a mad scientist.  Finally, this film has some spectacular kills that are what you would expect to see in a top notch zombie flick.  The kills are extremely gory with some amazing practical effects that rivals what you see at the hands of the legendary Greg Nicotero on The Walking Dead.  Overall, Bombshell Bloodbath is fucking amazing.  This film will go down in zombie film history along with the classics.  Check it out because this film is well worth the time.

Valley of the Sasquatch

Director - John Portanova (A Visitor in the Night)
Starring - Bill Oberst Jr, (Coyote, Red Dirt Rising), Jason Vail (The Cabin, The Originals), and Miles Joris-Peyrafitte (Gut)
Release Date - 2015
Genre - Horror
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     The face of horror is often changing depending on what fad is currently taking place.  We are currently in a paranormal found footage craze that is almost overshadowed by the zombie apocalypse.  However, when I think of horror I think of the days long gone during the drive-in age.  Movies then featured cheesy stories and equally as cheesy monsters.  The drive-in era ruled the 60s and 70s and around that time we saw an increase in bigfoot films.  Sadly. this is a trend that did not last long and that is due to the quality of the bigfoot films.  During this time we did get a few bigfoot flicks that were fun and would go on to become horror classics.  The remainder, however, went on to become films that are often mocked and spoofed.  Over the years we see a few films pop up here and there and most are shit.  With that being said, I recently came across the film Valley of the Sasquatch when I received an email requesting that I review it.  I saw that it had Jason Vail and Bill Oberst Jr in it and I gladly accepted.  

     The film follows a father and son pair who are struggling financially after the death of their wife and mother.  They are unable to keep their home and move into an old shack in the woods.  The father, Roger (Vail), is having a hard time coping with the lose if this wife and it is affecting his relationship with his son.  Roger is dedicating his time to fixing the shack and preparing for winter while he forces his son to search for a job.  However, before they do all that, Roger invites his asshole friend Sergio and his polite brother up for a weekend of drinking and hunting.  That does not go according to plan when they spot something in the woods.  The beast inspires paranoia among the group until they are finally attacked and forced to fight for their lives.

     Modern bigfoot flicks are a touchy subject among horror fans.  Too many rely on cheap visual effects that take away from the film.  When you have a shitty creature the film falls apart.  However, Valley of the Sasquatch took the minimalist approach to the creature feature and it worked very well.  The film shows the creature as little as possible and relies heavily on the horror of the situation to work to it's advantage.  The acting in this one is top notch which is something I expected when I saw Jason Vail and Bill Oberst Jr. was attached.  Both are amazing actors and this film is another prime example of why these two are constantly getting cast in films.  The remainder of the cast did a solid job as well which really helps the story flow along.  The story for this one is simple, easy to follow, and very effective.  The film reminds me a lot of the 1990 film Demon Wind which follows a group of people that are trapped in a cabin while forces of evil (supernatural or cryptid) try to get in and kill them.  Hell, you can even name a dozen or so other films that follow the same story but none involve sasquatch and that is a huge plus for me.  The story, also, effectively uses the "show as little as possible" technique used in most monster films and for once it actually worked, and when we finally get a good look at the beast it was well worth it.  Finally, the film has several bloody moments but they are done in a tasteful manner and do not shower the viewer in unnecessary gore.  The film has some great practical effects as well and the beast looks great for the short period of time we get to see it.  My only real complaint about the film was that it was just too damn dark and as a reviewer I am torn about how to handle this.  I sometimes get a rough cut of a film and it may be dark before being color corrected.  I am assuming this is the case.  Overall, Valley of the Sasquatch is a great addition to the creature feature revival.  It has bloodcurdling suspense and an amazing cast of indie stars that makes this film a must see.  This film is destined to be a modern indie classic so do yourself a favor and check it out!

Bound

Director - Jared Cohn (The Horde, Buddy Hutchins)
Starring - Charisma Carpenter (Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Angel), Bryce Draper (Muck, The Haves and the Haves Not), and Daniel Baldwin (Grimm, Zero Dark Thirty)
Release Date - 2015
Genre - Drama/Thriller
Tagline - "No grey, only black and white"
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5);

     Every few years a film adaptation comes about and causes a bit of a stir.  Recent years saw the Harry Potter book series turned into an extremely successful film franchise.  That was soon followed up by the painful Twilight Saga with some Percy Jackson scattered throughout until we hit the Hunger Games films.  Now, the erotic book series 50 Shades of Grey has mature women all worked up with the recent release of the film adaptation.  Most of you are wondering why I am talking about that film and why I am reviewing the mockbuster from the fine folks over at The Asylum.  In 2013 I attended ShockaCon and met director Jared Cohn.  Jared, along with Eugene Clark, talked to me for a bit and took a few photos.  He later befriended me on Facebook and has been supplying with news ever since.  He recently took on the mockbuster Bound that stars the beautiful Charisma Carpenter of Buffy fame.  I really wanted to see this flick and Jared, along with his producer Gabriel Campisi, was nice enough to send me a link to an online screener.  Thanks guys!

     The film follows Michelle (Carpenter) who is a very successful business woman but is struggling sexually.  Her current lover just doesn't do anything for her.  However, things change when she meets a younger man named Ryan (Draper) who begins to push her sexual boundaries.  This soon proves to be not enough and he starts invading her personal life,  First he tries to ruin an important business venture by turning on her vibrating panties.  He then forces her to fuck on her father's desk before she finally tries to call it off.  This backfires when he informs her that he has been fucking her daughter as well.  She dives deeper into the world of BDSM until she finally gets her revenge.
     When I first heard of the film I assumed it would be a a romantic flick that was extremely sexual.  However, I was surprised to discover that the film was actually a sexual thriller that really knew how to use the suspense to it's advantage.  The acting in this film is great by most of the cast.  Charisma Carpenter is just as sexy as ever and shows shes still got it.  She also does an amazing job in her role which makes the story easier to swallow.  The supporting cast is great which is something we normally don't see from an Asylum flick.  Sadly, I was not impressed with Bryce Draper's performance.  His demeanor never changes throughout the film which makes is almost impossible to like his character before the story actually turns dark.  The story for this one is an erotic drama that quickly turns into a very dark thriller.  However, the acting makes the story feel a little confusing.  The intent was for the viewer to be enthralled by the introduction of the sex-educated man but that is not the case.  The character's introduction does not do that.  Instead, the viewer immediately picks up the vibe that he is a douche only to discover that he is, in fact, a douche.  This takes the effectiveness of the story down a little. Finally, this thriller is not focused around death so we do not get any kill scenes and great special effects.  The film relies heavily on rich story and just enough suspense to draw the viewer.  Overall, Bound is a solid thriller that is has some great atmosphere and an amazing performance from Charisma Carpenter.  This film is sexy and deserves a watch.

Deadwood Park (2007)

 

Deadwood Park (2007)

directed by:  Eric Stanze

starring:  William Clifton, Lindsey Luscri, Bryan Lane, Jason Allen Wolfe, Jason Christ, Emily Haack, Gus Stevenson, Eric Stanze, Eli Wallace, Jake Wallace

 

 



 

(out of 5)

     The Movie:  Deadwood Park has a few things that make it different from just the horror norm.  First of all without getting into a lot of spoilers it covers a few different genres.  Without naming them outright let's just say you will not be disappointed with the direction change this movie continues to take.  So many independent filmmakers out there stick with what is known most especially the slasher film which is good and all but the movies that stick with you are ones like this that really make you think.  Then again Eric Stanze and the rest of Wicked Pixel Cinema always put together a solid movie.  At the moment the Stanze family are putting together a new film called In Memory Of...and I can't wait for that one either. 

The Acting:  On point, especially William Clifton whom at first I was sketchy about but once the movie got going I began to appreciate his sort of "lost" mannerisms and style.  At least that's what I took from it.  His character is very much confused and in a sort of panic mode and Mr. Clifton hit that note quite well.  Also Lindsey Luscri deserves more than an honorable mention here I very much enjoyed her inclusion in this film as well as the Bryan Lane who played her father the sheriff.  It was kind of different for this superfan not seeing my favorite regulars in main roles in this one, Emily Haack and Jason Christ, but hey sometimes I guess you have to switch it up.  I mean goodness look what happens everytime Rob Zombie makes a movie...everyone flies off the deep end because the guy puts his friends and wife in his own movie. 

The Gore:  This is an Eric Stanze film of course there's gore and the fx in this one are top notch!  Most especially a rotting corpse inside a train tunnel and a burning corpse scene that continues to move while in flames.  Very cool. 

The Script:  I loved it.  Like stated above the movie just jumps from one genre to the next and twists and turns and again really makes you think.  Not getting into the story here but let's just say it involves a victim of a child murderer returning to his old home town to sort some things out in his head.  Naturally things go bad to worse as he starts seeing things including the supernatural.  Very natural small town dialogue in this one.

The Rating:  Yes I'm bias as not only a superfan but friend to those who make up Wicked Pixel but really Deadwood Park is just creepy as shit and a great story to boot.  Highly recommended.

 



Attack of the Herbals

Director - David Ryan Keith (The Redwood Massacre)
Starring - Calum Booth, Steve Worsley (The Suppressor), and Richard Currie (Dead Funny)
Release Date - 2011
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "Putting the tea back into terror"
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Most people prefer to take their horror seriously with buckets of gore.  I enjoy a bloody flick but I need a story to hold me to the film otherwise it is a waste of time.  That is why I tend to favor the horror comedies or black comedies.  They tend to have a decent story all while making me laugh.  Last month I was able to check out the amazing slasher The Redwood Massacre.  The film was very impressive and serious in tone.  Director David Ryan Keith let me know that he had directed the horror comedy from 2011 titled Attack of the Herbals.  I asked if I could check it out and he was nice enough to send me a link to the online screener.  Thanks David!

     The film follows two friends who discover a crate that has washed up on the shoreline.  They open it and start selling the contents as tea to the locals in their small village.  The tea is a hit and people all over the small village start seeking them out to buy it in bulk.  However, as they approach the last of their supply they learn that the tea was put there by the Nazis during World War II.  They quickly learn that those that drink large amounts of the tea turn into the undead and start killing at will.  This forces the two unlikely heroes, along with a beautiful young woman, to fight the undead before they succumb to their bloodlust.
     I love horror comedies, however, they are never able to combine equal amounts of horror and comedy.  Most go overboard with one or the other and never give the viewer the perfect mix.  Some, like Evil Dead II, gives the viewer more horror than comedy.  While other films, like Shaun of the Dead, gives the viewer more comedy than they do horror.  Attack of the Herbals falls under that second example with the comedy far outweighing the horror.  With that being said. I really enjoyed the laughs the film offered even thought it did skip on the horror.  The acting in this film is top notch and adds a lot of fun to the film.  Calum Booth and Steve Worsley are the stars of the show and for a good reason.  They have amazing on screen chemistry and they both feed off each other making each scene they are in a joy to watch.  The rest of the cast is great as well and that makes this film amazing to watch.  They all are able to give the viewer characters of different backgrounds.  They are all quirky and animated.  The story for this one is something we have seen before but never with this spin or done in the comedy format.  I have seen so many films featuring Nazi experiments creating zombies but never done with tea.  This was a fun concept and added a sense of absurdity to the already humorous story.  Finally, the film has a few on screen kills but they are not as bloody or as gory as I would have liked but considering this film is a comedy instead of a horror flick, it is only fitting.  Sadly, the film lacks any real practical effects and skips on making the zombies look like zombies.  I think this film was attempting to make the zombies more of the rage infected zombies that can be found in 28 Days Later but skipped on the violence.  Overall, Attack of the Herbals is a fun horror comedy that has a ton of laughs and can be enjoyed by fans of any genre.  However, if you are looking for a direct horror flick then this one is not for you.  I highly recommend this one!