Friday, June 6, 2014

Fuckenstein

Director - Joanna Angel (The Walking Dead: A Hardcore Parody)
Starring - Joanna Angel, Roman Nomar (Dirty Rotten Mother Fuckers 7), and James Deen (Screaming Assgasms)
Release Date - 2012
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Format - DVD (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):
     Horror parodies are bitter sweet to me.  The films tend to be on the bad side but the viewer just can't stop watching.  What makes it even more compelling is if the film is a parody of a film the viewer really enjoys.  Several horror classics have went through the porn parody treatment.  The films Halloween, Friday the 13th, Re-Animator, and The Exorcist are all flicks that were turned into fuck flicks.  Leading this horror porn movement is Burning Angel ran by the beautiful Joanna Angel.  This porn company has parodied The Walking Dead, Re-Animator, and The Evil Dead.  In 2012 the company created a parody of the classic Mary Shelly tale called Fuckenstein.  With a title like that I had to see it so I ordered a copy just to review...yea, just to review.  
     The film follows an evil scientist (Deen) who wants nothing more than to pleasure his wife (Angel).  One night the two are fucking and he slides his finger in her sphincter and she goes hog wild.  This gives him an idea.  The the scientist, along with his henchman Igor (Ssippi), set out to create the perfect man to dp his wife.  The experiment is a success and the two ravage her holes.  Life couldn't be better for the slutty housewife until the creature becomes jealous of the scientist and rips his head off.  The End!
     Two kind of people watch horror porn.  One type of person watches it because they want something to stroke to.  These same people will watch any kind of porn flick just to make their wrist sore.  The other kind of people watch horror porn just to see where it goes.  A real "curiosity killed the cat" scenario.  Most of the horror porns I have seen have been un-watchable.  They took some of my favorite horror flicks and turn them into disgusting fuck flicks filled with funny one liners and pornographic puns.  When I say the films are disgusting I am not referring to the sex scenes.  Sex is beautiful.  I am actually referring to the fact they have gallons of fake blood pouring on those screwing and in some cases the girls are throwing up (fake vomit) while fucking.  This film avoided having the disgusting sex scenes and went about it in a more traditional manner.  Sadly, the entire film was fucking and skipped on what could have been horror porn gold.  The acting in this one is actually some of the better performances I have seen in horror porn.  With that being said, the cast really shouldn't stop making fuck films and focus on actual cinema.  The story for this one is clever but the film was not able to actually capitalize on the full story of Frankenstein.  This film just used one small aspect and then fucked.  This took away from the charm most other horror porns have.  Finally, the film does have a death scene but it is off camera.  This is actually very effective and we do get some decent special effects with that one kill.  Overall, Fuckenstein is a typical porn set to a small portion of the Frankenstein story.  Porn fans will enjoy yourselves but horror fans will be disappointed.




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