Thursday, December 31, 2020

Dragon Soldiers


Director - Hank Braxtan (Snake Outta Compton, Chemical Peel)
Starring - Antuone Torbert (Soul Hunters, Alien Expedition), Ruben Pla (Insidious, Dead Air), and Tarkan Dospil (Snake Outta Compton, Chemical Peel)
Release Date - 2020
Genre - Action/Fantasy
Tagline - "Hell came from above"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     When I started writing reviews for my blog I wanted to review old action and exploitation movies that time has forgot.  Over time my love of horror took over and I was reviewing mostly horror releases which caught the eye of Horror Society.  Once I was brought on I started reviewing horror but some non-horror releases would sneak in.  A lot of times these movies were exploitation but I do get the random non-genre piece in to review.  A few weeks back I received the fantasy action film Dragon Soldiers from Hank Braxtan who brought us the parody Snake Outta Compton.  I want to thank Lionsgate for sending this one my way.
     The film follows a small town that has a spike in missing persons.  The mayor brings in a group of mercenaries to go into the woods to see what is taking the townspeople.  What they find deep in the woods is a fire-breathing dragon and a cult that worships it.  The mercs and the cult fight it out while the dragon wreaks havoc.
     Dragon Soldiers is a movie that I typically wouldn't watch on my own.  I don't mind CGI filled fantasy movies but this one just didn't look up my alley.  When I got this one in for review I watched the trailer for it to see what kind of movie it was and the trailer painted a very cheap experience.  Honestly, the movie wasn't as bad as the trailer looked.  The acting in this one is surprisingly well done.  The characters are what you would expect from a film like this but the cast does a fantastic job in their roles.  I honestly wish this cast was in a better film.  The story for this one has potential but fails to gain momentum.  The film gives us some interesting ideas like the dragon's cult and how it's breathe can control humans.  This is something that could have been so much more but it just appears and disappears just as fast leaving the film to become a bit stale.  Watching mercenaries scramble in the woods while spitting out commando jargon was rather boring.  It really felt like an old Fred Olen Ray or Roger Corman movie from the late 70s or 80s but made now.  It would have been so much more fun if it was from them during that era.  Finally, this film is not bloody.  We do have a few burnt bodies and a lot of horribly CGI dragon action.  The CGI is what you would expect and makes anything from mid 2000's Sy-Fy look like the Mona Lisa.  Overall, Dragon Soldiers has an amazing cast and a few interesting ideas but fails to deliver anything memorable.  Instead, we get a boring film with horrible CGI and a laughable story.  Skip it.  

Sins of the Flesh



Director - Claude Mulot (The Blood Rose, Sexyrella)
Starring - Francis Lemonnier (I Can't Sleep, Green Harvest), Patrick Penn (New Generation, What a Flash!), and Anne Libert (Cat and Mouse, House of 1000 Pleasures)
Release Date - 1974
Genre - Thriller/Crime
Tagline - "Mystery.  Murder.  And madness.  Laced with extravagant sexuality"
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):



     This week I took a little bit of a break from horror.  I decided to focus on some of the sleazier releases I've received for review.  After checking out three of the Nikkatsu Erotic Films Collection and the exploitation film Sex Terrorists on Wheels, I decided to return to my beloved genre with three new horror reviews.  Two of these were new indie releases while the other was a new release from Mondo Macabro.  I decided to keep the Mondo theme going and decided to review the sexploitation film Sins of the Flesh which was released in France under the title Les Charnelles.  
     The film follows a the adult son of a wealthy businessman who is living on his father's dime until dear ol' dad has had enough.  His lavish lifestyle is now a thing of the past along with his sex drive.  He can no longer get it up.  He catches a young man attempting to steal his car and the two pair up.  HE uses the thief to help him make extra money and in return he lets him sleep with women in his home which he finds turns him on watching.  
     A lot of the movies I get in for review are movies I had never heard of before.  It's because of this I never know what to really expect when I toss them in.  Mondo Macabro has released some seriously underrated horror and sleaze over the years.  A few of the releases wasn't for me but several are some of my favorite films in my collection now.  While Evil Dead and Night of the Living Dead (my favorite horror film so I'm not knocking it) is getting it's 20th re-release other movies are going unnoticed.  That is why I really appreciate the work boutique labels like MM is doing.  Sins of the Flesh was a surprising sleazy good time.  I really enjoyed this flick and I'm now really curious about some of Claude Mulot's other releases after this one.  The acting in this one is pretty well done.  The characters contrast each other while the cast does a fantastic job bring the characters to life.  I've seen a lot of sexploitation and sleazy movie over the years but this one is the best acted by far.  From doing a little research I see that this is the turning point in Claude Mulot's career where he took a raunchy turn which would make sense where this one was casted so well.  The story for this one mixes adult with some crime and a little dash of thriller.  It does have some predictability but the characters and sleaziness holds your attention very well.  With that being said, the film does struggle with what kind of movie it wants to be.  At it's heart, it's a sexploitation film but the addition of the crime doesn't fully reach it's potential while the little dash of thriller is just flash in a pan.  Here one second and gone the next.  Finally, there is a little blood but those looking for a bloody mess will want to check out another Mondo release because this one is not it.  Instead, we get plenty of naked bodies and voyeurism.  Overall, Sins of the Flesh was not what I was expecting but it entertained nonetheless.  I really enjoyed this sleazy ride and the transfer from Mondo is absolutely gorgeous.  This blu looks amazing with some solid special features to accompany it.  Collectors will want to snag this one.  

Wednesday, December 30, 2020

Seven Women for Satan




Director - Michel Lemoine (Kiss Me Monster, Castle of the Creeping Flesh)
Starring - Michel Lemoine, Nathalie Zeiger (Kill Squad, Playing with Fire), and Howard Vernon (Howl of the Devil, Zombie Lake)
Release Date - 1976
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "The French film BANNED in France"
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     With December coming to an end so is 2020.  I have one day left to squeeze in one last review before I spend time with my family for the new year.  A few days ago I received two new releases from Mondo Macabro.  Over the years Mondo has released some serious films that I absolutely loved so I was really looking forward to checking these out.  With just one day left to review before I took a break until the new year I decided I would be spending my time with 1976's Seven Women for Satan directed by and starring Michel Lemoine.  Thank you Mondo and CAV for sending this one over!
     The film follows a successful business man who has good intentions but his family's blood courses through his veins.  His family has owned the castle he resides in for many centuries and used the dungeon to torture and kill many people.  Now, whenever he finds himself in the company of women he finds himself wanting to kill them.  Add in visions of a lost love and you are in for a castle full of murder and mayhem.  
     I've always had a soft spot for 70's Satanic films.  This was the beginning of the great Satanic Panic and a lot of these cheeseball films were fun.  I had never heard of this one prior to the release but that didn't stop me from wanting to see it.  I found myself really enjoying this one but there was several unintentional funny moments that had me absolutely cracking up.  Regardless if it was intentional or not I enjoyed the film a lot.  The acting in this one is great.  Lemoine is brilliant in his duel performance.  The mild mannered lord of the castle performance is very genuine and down to Earth.  He is great in the respect.  The other side of this character, the demented female killer, was my favorite part of the movie.  Hearing him scream at the women and become unhinged was the unintentionally funny moments of the film.  I couldn't help but laugh at these scenes but they made the film for me.  The supporting cast is solid as well but the characters do not stand out like Lemoine's.  The story for this one is a little messy but enjoyable for the most part.  Having the man struggling with his inner madness is nothing new to horror.  Putting that same character in a centuries old castle full of torture devices does mix it up some but it's still very easy to follow and works for the story.  However, the movie does get a little chaotic with the introduction of the lost love that torments him.  The movie could have really done without that aspect because it is a little confusing and breaks the pacing of the film up.  Aside from this, I loved the story.  Finally, this one has some bloody moments.  Some of the kills are rather lackluster and unimaginative while one or two was really fun and memorable.  The inconsistencies doesn't really take away from the film but one of them will leave you thinking about it days later.  Overall, Seven Women for Satan is a cheap, surprisingly funny, but highly entertaining mid-70s Eurotrash film that you was looking for.  I really enjoyed it.  The transfer from Mondo looks absolutely perfect.  The screen grabs are from the trailer and should not be used to justify the look of this release.  I highly suggest this for fans of Eurotrash.  You will not be disappointed.  

Human Hibachi




Director - Mario Cerrito III (#DrinkDriveDie, The Listing)
Starring - Wataru Nishida (The Porns, Japanese Borscht), Andrew Hunsicker (Bamboo Shark, House of Cards), and Zachary Pun Chung (Jade)
Release Date - 2020
Genre - Horror
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Social media is an invaluable resource for indie horror fans.  Most no budget releases get no sort of marketing or press blasts.  In fact, a good portion of the news I share on the site comes from the filmmakers, actors, producers, and so on contacting me personally to share their releases.  A few days ago I was browsing through Instagram when a page for the film Human Hibachi reached out to me about reviewing their film.  I had received some news about this sometime back from a PR firm that handles no budget news so I was familiar with it but I had yet to see it.  I went ahead and jumped at the chance to see it and I'm glad I did.  I was really impressed by the film.
     The film follows a man who is recording the entire day for his girlfriend to commemorate her birthday.  He records everything from the smallest of tasks until they dinner date with some friends.  This seemingly innocent day then takes a deadly turn when the menu suddenly changes.
     I didn't know what to expect from Human Hibachi but I did suspect it was heavily centered around cannibalism hence the title.  I was not expecting the film to be laid out like it was.  I really enjoyed it and can see myself tossing it in again but there is a few things I didn't care for with it.  The acting in this one is hit or miss with me.  I typically avoid found footage like films because the small talk and banter that many use to give the film that authentic home video look usually doesn't work for me.  I find it painfully awkward and I've seen so many amazing actors and actresses attempt this only to fail.  Human Hibachi tries this approach so we get several minutes of awkward conversations before the film picks up.  I will speak on the acting from this point forward.  I really enjoyed the acting from this aspect on.  The characters were very cliched BUT they built up some great personalities that made the film enjoyable.  I really enjoyed the performances in the later portion of the film and how it was more grounded than the first hour or so.  The story for this one is pieces together in two sections.  The first following the couple on their long day.  This was a solid start to the film but the small talk and hearing the character recording the film narrate himself through each scene was a bit of a bore. It's not until the second act that the film picks up.  Here it does drag it's feet but we find much of the film's humor and horror.  It works but doesn't have to be as long as it is either.  Honestly, the film could be trimmed down to an hour and it would be damn near perfect.  Finally, the film doesn't shy away from the red stuff but it's use of meat is what sends it over the edge.  The film has several scenes with plenty of blood but it makes use of a restaurant to work in the meat for the cannibal angle.  This really make the story work while using real meat.  Overall, Human Hibachi may not be the best film I've seen this year but it was enjoyable.  I could see myself spinning this one again with some friends and plenty of beer.  Hell, we could even order out for some Japanese to get the full effect.  I would highly recommend checking this one out especially if you are vegan!  

Tuesday, December 29, 2020

Beetlejism



Director - T.H. Royal (Mind Mirror, Murder by Sex)
Starring - Jerame Juice, Heather Austin, and Eric East
Release Date - 1991
Genre - Horror
Format - Streaming

Rating (out of 5):

     Still being a sleazy piece of shit!  I have a horror marathon planned for the next few days so I thought I would spend a little time with some sleaze.  I had been binging horror movies for several months so I was a little burned out on them.  After a few days of Nikkatsu Erotic Films, an exploitation flick, and a porn parody I decided to check out another Tim Burton inspired porn parody.  This time I went with another Beetlejuice parody as I check out 1991's Beetlejism.
     The film follows a young couple who purchase a fixer upper.  The home needs a lot of work but the husband is optimistic of the entire ideal.  However, the house is home to several spirits including the spirit of Beetlejism who sexually corrupted the entire county.  Now, he is sending spirits to seduce the couple.
     I was really looking forward to checking this one out.  The artwork for this one lead me to believe that it was going to be a knock out parody of Beetlejuice but it wasn't.  In fact, it was one of the weakest parodies I have ever seen.  It was a miserable experience that was completely lazy.  Even the fucking was lazy.  The acting in this one is the same quality you would get from late 80s and early 90s S.O.V. films.  I've seen better acting in a Polonia Brother's film.  The cast doesn't try to act and even the sex scenes are very unenthused.  The character of Beetlejism was the biggest disappointment in the film.  He just awkwardly smiles while wearing regular clothes.  If you expected the character on the cover then you will be very disappointed.  The story for this one is somewhat similar to the original film with a couple buying an old house.  However, that's the end of it there.  We then have Beetlejism sending ghosts to seduce the couple in several sex scenes.  A very poor parody and a bland film.  Finally, if you were expecting some supernatural hijinks with your porn then you will be very disappointed.  In fact, there is none aside from a few camera effects when it shows Beetlejism's face.  Overall, this is was lazy parody, a lazy porn, and an all around lazy film experience.  I was hoping for so much more and was very disappointed.  If you ever see yourself presented with the opportunity to see this one I would suggest skipping it.  

Beaver Juice



Director - C. Everette Smythe (Deep C Diver, Whorelock)
Starring - Biff Malibu (Peekers, Purple Rubbers), Victoria Paris (Forbidden Pleasures, Roadgirls), and Charisma (Southern Side Up, Sexlock)
Release Date - 1992
Genre - Comedy
Format - Streaming 

Rating (out of 5):

     Why not keep the sleazy train rolling right along?  I just had a triple feature featuring three Nikkatsu Erotic Films from Impulse Pictures before moving on to the exploitation film Sex Terrorists on Wheels.  My Sleazy Sunday reviews have been very on the site so I decided to keep it going.  After Edward Penishand I decided to check out two more Tim Burton parodies.  The first one was 1992's Beaver Juice which was an obvious parody of Beetlejuice.  This is one of the many adult films that you can find streaming online.
        The film follows Beaver Juice who is a talk show host that just learned that the television executives has cancelled his show.  To retaliate, he has stolen the control panel and airs amateur porn in his defiance. 
     I never expect much from porn parodies but I do expect to laugh at the puns and cleverness of the films.  I've seen some really bad porn parodies and I've seen some good ones.  Beaver Juice falls somewhere in the middle.  It was funny in it's own right but wasn't that good of a parody.  The acting in this one is not the best.  In fact, it's near the bottom when compared to some of the other porn parodies I've seen.  The cast does not try to create characters and just spits out their dialogue in anticipation of their sex scenes.  This cast is clearly here for the porn aspect and nothing else.  The story for this one is not truly a parody of Beetlejuice and with Beaver Juice being the only aspect that this film uses.  Beaver Juice's personality is nothing like Beetlejuice and the story is it's own.  With that being said, it was actually fun in a very sleazy way.  Beaver Juice taking over the television station to air amateur porn was entertaining in it's own way.  Almost like an X rated Airheads.  Finally, no blood or gore in this one but there is plenty of skin and amateur sex.  If that is what you are looking for then this one is for you.  Overall, Beaver Juice is a piss poor parody but a fun sleazy adult comedy.  If you are looking for a Beetlejuice parody like I was you will be very disappointed.  However, if you enjoy sleaze then this one is for you.  

Sex Terrorists on Wheels



Director - Stefan Ruf (One by One)
Starring - Larissa Dali (A Simple Tale of Revenge, Atrocity), Jecca Bitner (Down with David, Save Yourself), and Justin Henry (The Curse of Babylon, Slaughter Creek)
Release Date - 2019
Genre - Crime
Tagline - "Amigo, they come from hell..."
Format - Streaming (Online Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I spent a few days watching some sleazy releases from Impulse Pictures.  The Nikkatsu Erotic Films Collection always brings something to the table and I find them to be very interesting.  I wouldn't bet my salary on it but I believe that some of these releases were what inspired torture porn that has become infamous among the extreme horror fans.   Anyway, after watching Love Hunters, Zoom Up: Murder Site, and Flower and Snake I decided to keep it sleazy.  A few days ago director Stefan Ruf reached out to me to review his exploitation film Sex Terrorists on Wheels.  The film has since been retitled to Motorpsycho Maniacs but it fit right in with these other sleazy films I had just finished watching.  I want to thank Stefan for contacting me to review this one because I fucking loved it!
     The film follows the outlaw motorcycle gang The Sex Terrorists who travel the Texas countryside searching people to rape and kill.  However, they meet their match when they cross paths with a Texas Marshall who is undercover and a blind sniper who has a soft spot for wildlife.
     A movie that was titled Sex Terrorists on Wheels and then retitled Motorpsycho Maniacs really makes your imagination race.  What the fuck was I about to get myself into and how crazy would this film be if it was originally titled Sex Terrorists on Wheels?  That title has some pretty big shoes to fill but Ruf and company does a fantastic job and delivers a truly unforgettable exploitation experience.  The acting in this one shattered all my expectations.  I absolutely loved the casting and the cast brought to life some amazing characters.  I fucking love a movie that has larger than life characters with unforgettable personalities.  Ruf did an amazing job with the casting here.  The story for this one is exploitation meets cat and mouse.  It works and ties in a lot of the crime elements that made the biker exploitation flicks of the 70s so much fun.  It does hit a bit of a dry spell several times throughout the film but the characters and their interactions together helps move the film along.  Finally, the film has several bloody and violent moments scattered throughout for the sick fucks that love the gorier side of cinema.  We get plenty of blood, dismemberment, and liver tacos.  The effects are pretty solid but a few instances does show the film's budget.  They don't look bad but you can tell the film was limited.  Overall, Motorpsycho Maniacs is an exploitation film for the modern ages.  It's sleazy, vulgar, and bloody which is all you can ask for.  Fans of Dear God No! will want to check this one out because you will not be disappointed.  I don't really care for the title change but I understand why it had to happen.  Too many sensitive people with internet access has ruined such an amazing title.  Regardless, this movie needs to be seen.  

Monday, December 28, 2020

Flower and Snake



Director - Masaru Konuma (Woman in a Box 2, Getting Raped)
Starring - Naomi Tani (Rope and Skin, Lady Black Rose), Nagatoshi Sakamoto (Red Snow, Gate of Flesh), and Hijiri Abe (Secret Chronicle: Prostitution Market, The Hell-Fated Courtesan)
Release Date - 1974
Genre - Horror
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I've been reviewing some of the Nikkatsu Erotic Films Collection for a few years now and every release that I received were movies I had never heard of before.  However, for the first time, I received one that I have heard about.  Several years ago on the Upcoming Horror Movie's forum someone had mentioned the film Flower and Snake along with the remake.  I didn't know much about it but I had, in fact, heard about it before the release.  Once I got the blu in I was very curious to see movie that actually inspired a remake.  Thanks Impulse for sending this one over.
     This film follows a wealthy man who hires someone to kidnap his wife.  He wants the man to beat, torture, degrade, and sexually assault her while taking photographs.  His goal is to make her submissive and to use the photos to blackmail her into staying with him.  
     Flower and Snake seems to be more popular of the Nikkatsu Erotic Films with many horror and underground film fans talking about it.  Sure, I had heard about it prior to receiving the blu for review but I never checked it out until now.  It works for the kind of film it was going for but I don't see myself ever viewing it again.  With that being said, I'm grateful to add it to my collection.  The acting in this one is the best I've seen out of these films.  Due to the graphic nature of the film, the cast has a certain intensity that needs to be met in order to make the film believable.  The cast really does deliver a great performance where they go above and beyond what most actors would on set.  The story for this one is another example of torture porn where we find someone bound and tortured to fit the story.  I typically find films like this very boring and one dimensional but this one has more to it than that.  We have some character development and the scenes focus on other aspects of the story aside from the torture.  It works but it does get a bit slow during the middle of the film.  Finally, this is not a bloody film.  The movie focuses on one woman's torment and how far a man will go to break her will.  It's not for those looking for a sleazy good time or a bloody flick.  Overall, Flower and Snake is a rough one to watch but the story does pull you in and hold you.  I would recommend it for anyone wanting a movie that will make them feel uncomfortable.  The transfer is great with this one but the lack of special features does make it a questionable purchase for some.  

Zoom Up: Murder Site



Director - Koyu Ohara (Sins of Sister Lucia, Rope Hell)
Starring - Erina Miyai (Zoom In: Rape Apartments, Women in Prison), Yuki Yoshizawa (Anne's Lullaby, Hell of Roses), and Yoko Azusa (Female Teacher Hunting, Crazed Fruit)
Release Date - 1979
Genre - Horror
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     When I get a package in from Impulse Pictures I know that I'm about to see some crazy and sleazy movies from Japan.  Their Nikkatsu Erotic Films Collection usually entertain and are one of my favorite parts of my collection.  Several months back I received Love Hunters on blu and was surprised that the film was actually released on blu.  Up until now I had only recieved these releases on DVD.  A few days back I recieved another package from Impulse and this time it was two blus releases from the Nikkatsu Erotic Films Collection.  The first one I decided to check out is 1979's Zoom Up: Murder Site that was also released under Zoom Up: Rape Site.  This is the second or third film I've seen in the Zoom Up series and it was just as entertaining as the others.  Thank you Impulse for sending this one over.  
     The film is centered around a serial rapist/murderer that has the city scared.  The police is tracking down any lead they can which results in the wrong person becoming the suspect.  Stuck in the middle of the mayhem is a woman that has committed adultery and believes the real killer witnessed her infidelity.
     The Zoom Up series is a little rough at times but this one set the bar.  It looks like this may be the first film in the series but I can't really confirm this but based on the release date I  believe this is the first one.  With that being said, I enjoyed it.  Rape based films are not my thing and I find movies like that very uncomfortable but this one was able to walk a fine line between story and shocking.  The acting in this one is decent but some of the scenes were a little underacted.  The characters are very cliched and generic but the cast doesn't try to deliver great performances.  We get the sex scenes that are full of life...and death while the rest of the film is dry and unenergetic.  The story for this one work for an erotic horror tale.  The rape doesn't over do the film and the story is full of eroticism and crime thriller elements.  With that being said, the story doesn't really flow straight forward.  We have some trippy dream-like sequences along with some side stories that splits the story up some.  I can appreciate a film like this that doesn't rely solely on the rape angle in the story.  Finally, the film has some death and practical effects with one awesome scene in particular but if you are looking for a real splatter flick you will be disappointed.  The practical effects look solid enough but the nudity is the real selling point of this one.  Overall, Murder Site is a wild and sleazy ride.  It will not be for everyone but for those of you that are looking for the raunchy side of cinema you will find something entertaining here.  The transfer looks great as well but the lack of suplemental content makes this release a little disappointing.  

Love Hunter



Director - Seiichiro Yamaguchi (Love Hunter: Lust, Love Hunter: Hot Skin)
Starring - Hidemi Hara (Night of the Felines, Affair at Twilight), Mari Tanaka (The Naked Seven, Survivor of the Massacre), and Ryuhu Oizumi (Crazy for Love, Female Coed: Sexy Dynamite)
Release Date - 1972
Genre - Drama
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):



     The last few months I've been working hard on reviewing horror movies.  In fact, I think I may have horror'd myself out a little bit.  I love watching and reviewing movies but I've watched so many horror movies since Halloween that I'm a little burned out.  I still love watching movies so I decided to give horror a break for a few days while I watch a few movies that was sent my way from Impulse Pictures.  The first on the chopping block is 1972's Love Hunter from Seiichiro Yamaguchi.  This was a controversial release in Japan when it was released and several laws were put in place after it's release.  Thanks Impulse for sending this one over!
     The film follows a young man who is in love with his college girlfriend.  However, his sexual side is intrigued by the married woman who has sexual fantasies she wants fulfilled that her husband doesn't understand.
     Most of the Nikkatsu Erotic Films Collection is more on the torture and rape side with horror elements randomly placed.  I think these films were the starting point for torture porn within the extreme horror community.  However, Love Hunter is not that at all.  I'm not a scholar for the Nikkatsu films but I am making an assumption off the movie's I've reviewed in the past.  Love Hunter is a sexual drama that almost feels like an obscure romantic adult film with a love triangle.  Regardless, I actually enjoyed it.  The acting in this one is actually pretty well done.  The characters are very focused on the sex scenes but the acting leading up to it is actually solid.  The characters are cliched but the cast makes the scenes fun even when they are story focused and not focused on the sex.  The story for this one is a love triangle of sorts BUT centered around hedonism and sexual gratification.  It sounds like something that would run it's course before the hour mark is up but the movie is able to hold your attention with beautiful imagery, scenery, and character interaction.  It's not boring.  Finally, this is not a bloody flick.  However, if you want nudity, sexual intercourse, and beautifully shot scenes then this film is for you.  Overall, Love Hunter is a fun and sleazy film.  The story is entertaining and this transfer from Impulse looks absolutely amazing.  It's a shame that this one is lacking bonus content because it's a wonderful release that needs that little push to make it a contender.  Check it out if you are fans of other Nikkatsu releases.  

Game of Thrones: Season Eight




Creator(s) - David Benioff (Troy, X-Men Origins: Wolverine) and D.B. Weiss (It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia)
Starring - Gwendoline Christie (Wizards vs. Aliens, Star Wars: Episode VII: The Force Awakens), Kit Harington (Seventh Son, How to Train Your Dragon 2), and Emilia Clarke (Solo: A Star Wars Story, Terminator Genisys)
Release Date - 2019
Genre - Fantasy/Action
Tagline - "For the throne"
Format - 4K Ultra HD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Season seven is the highlight of the show in my opinion.  It was more action than alliances and politics with the biggest focus on the White Walkers and the north.  I was originally told this would be the best season and I should stop there.  Most fans of the show really dislike the last season but I tend to go against the grain so I was looking forward to see what would happen to the characters that I grew to love with season eight.  I should have listened to everyone and skipped this piss poor excuse for a season.
     This season follows the Night King and his undead army as they make their way from the north why Cersi has betrayed the Mother of Dragons.  Jon Snow and his army stop the army of the dead while Araya is able to kill the Night King.  With the army of the dead stopped they focus on Cersi and taking over King's Landing.  Once this is done the Mother of Dragons doesn't stop the killing there which puts Jon in a difficult situation.  
     I was actually looking forward to this season but it was apparent that the show was grasping here.  It was very predictable and the predictability really made the season lose it's impact.  It wasn't fun and it shouldn't have been rushed.  The acting in this one is still fantastic.  Emilia Clarke reaches an intensity that she did not in other seasons.  She is absolutely the star of the show and refuses to let anyone out do her.  With that being said, the rest of the cast is still absolutely amazing.  Every episode blows my mind with how great the cast is.  I'm now actively seeking out the other films and shows this cast has been in.  The story for this one is predictable and rushed.  The atmosphere and tension that the previous seasons had is gone.  Each episode takes a major event that should span a good portion of the season and gives them as little screen time as possible.  It's a short season and very underwritten and rushed.  Finally, the film is still just as bloody as the others while using the best visual effects of the season yet.  When the dragons were first introduced they were laughable but now they are serious parts of the story and look fantastic.  I wouldn't say the best use of visual effects I've seen to date but they do look good.  The practical effects fit the kills as well for the season.  The deaths are bloody, violent, and satisfy the most of the bloodthirsty horror fans.  Overall, Season eight is a huge disappointment.  It has one good episode but aside from that this season fails.  Honestly, do like most of the GoT fans suggest and skip this season altogether.  

Thursday, December 24, 2020

RoboWoman




Director - Dustin Ferguson (Angry Asian Murder Hornets, Ebola Rex)
Starring - Dawna Lee Heising (Apex Predators, Lake of Shadows), Brinke Stevens (The Slumber Party Massacre, October Moon), and Mel Novak (Tales of Frankenstein, Game of Death)
Release Date - 2019
Genre - Sci-Fi/Horror
Tagline - "Your future is terminated"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     In October I did my annual horror movie binge where I watched as many horror movies as I could.  As I prepared for my month long binge I collected several movies that I had never seen before to watch and review.  Some of those films were from indie filmmaker Dustin Ferguson.  I liked a couple and a few wasn't for me.  I may not like all his films but I definitely respect his hussle.  Sometime ago I received a couple press releases for his sci-fi film RoboWoman starring Dawna Lee Heising.  It looked like a movie I would really enjoy so I waited for it to get a release date.  When I saw Wild Eye was releasing it I had to see it.  I reached out to them and they were kind enough to send a copy my way.  Thanks guys!
     The film follows Vivica (Heising) on her last day at work.  She decides to go out with a co-worker to a friends birthday party and is soon raped by him and his friends.  They leave her for dead and she is rushed to the hospital.  A doctor proposes to her friend a radical treatment to save her using cybernetics.  Her friend agrees and she is treated.  Now, half human and half machine, she goes about her daily life trying to forget what happened but can't.  That's when she decides to use her new body to get revenge on those that raped her. 
     I was really looking forward to checking this one out.  A sci-fi flick that pays homage to RoboCop with a rape/revenge is absolutely brilliant.  Ferguson may not always knock one out of the park with me but he is extremely fucking clever.  RoboWoman has a few moments but the overall film just didn't work for me.  The acting in this one is very uneven but I wouldn't say it was bad.  I've seen Heising in other films and she does a solid job but she is not really convincing in her role as RoboWoman.  The way she delivers her lines and carries herself made the film feel more like a Fred Olen Ray nudie picture more than a sci-fi rape/revenge flick.  The supporting cast is pretty solid.  The characters had some great personalities and did not fade into the background.  The story for this one is a homage to RoboCop while mixing in some exploitation rape/revenge style vigilante action.  As I stated earlier, this is a brilliant idea that I absolutely fucking love but the execution doesn't quite make it as fun.  We get a lot of slower scenes that serve no purpose to the actual story.  All they do is extend the film's running time while distracting the viewer from the actual story.  If the film was trimmed down a bit and we got a little more of the action side added it would be an unforgettable indie flick.  Finally, the film is not a bloodbath like I was expecting.  We do get some great make-up and prosthetic effects but if you are looking for a gory sci-fi flick you will be very disappointed.  Overall, RoboWoman is an amazing idea on paper but not executed.  There is talks of a follow up when the pandemic is over and you can bet your sweet ass I'll be ready to see it but I pray that it does not follow in the same steps as this one.  It defininetly misses the mark.  

American Sasquatch




Director(s) - Jason Figgis (Dark Tales, Gore Theatre), Tony Newton (Blood Tales, Gore Grind) and Sam Mason-Bell (Home Videos, Toxic Schlock)
Starring - Shawn C. Phillips (Ebola Rex, 5G Zombies), Alexander Hauck (#Shakespeare's Shitstorm, Halloween Hell Night), and Christopher J. Long (Ted 2, Z)
Release Date - 2020
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Terror has no borders"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     It's no secret that I'm a fan of the bigfoot/yeti horror flicks of the 70s.  I couldn't imagine living through the drive-in era when these movies would often play as a double feature on the big screen.  These films are shitty by today's standards but I fucking love how cheesy and fun they are.  The last few years has seen a few movies pop up trying to pay homage to the famous cryptid and capture that cheesy gorilla suite fun that made these so much fun.  Some completely miss their marks while others nail it.  A few weeks ago Wild Eye Releasing sent me American Sasquatch to review.  They often hear me complain about artwork but my last two reviews for films from them featured some awesome artwork.  They will never top their Lycanimator release but I do like the artwork for American Sasquatch.  I want to take a second to thank Wild Eye for sending this one over.  
     The film follows a group of UK based cryptid investigators who travel out into the woods in search of bigfoot after a man has claimed to have seen the American cryptid.  Their trip starts out innocently enough but before long they find exactly what they are looking for with dangerous consequences.  
     Honestly, I don't know what I watched but this is one of the messiest indie releases I've ever seen.  I'm struggling to find any information on this one and the fact that it doesn't have an imdb page makes me wonder if this was unfinished projects put together to make one.  The movie feels like it was segments filmed prior to the pandemic with filler shot during the pandemic following the guidelines. The acting in this one is one is a bit rough.  The film starts with Shawn C. Phillips talking to a webcam in similar fashion to his YouTube channel.  Not much to really say here about that before we move to a man ranting while filming muddy water talking about it being bloody.  Once again, nothing much to say here.  We then move on to a group on YouTube talking UK bigfoot sightings.  They are very awkward to watch but they are very comfortable with each other.  This is a bit of a strange set up before moving into the found footage aspect of the film where their interactions become even more forced with each other.  The last portion of the film follows two hunters out looking for bear.  This is the best acted part of the film.  The characters fit the film nicely and they work very well with each other.  The story for this one is very confusing and jumps around a bit.  It's based in the UK...but titled American Sasquatch.  I understand it's in reference to UK sightings of a mostly American based cryptid but that title is very misleading.  Then we move into the YouTube like videos that break up the actual film and introduce the story.  The opening with Shawn C. Phillips makes no sense and could be removed from the film.  The movie has nothing to do with his character and his intro is just a waste of time because the we get a second intro from the actual YouTuber's that the film is about.  We then follow them on this dreadful trip before the film once again changes gears and we follow two more people into the woods.  It feels like this was a project that had to stop filming or something or that nature and was pieced together the best it could be.  Finally, is one of the driest bigfoot films I think I have ever seen.  The creature has very little screen time and the kills are so bland, out of focus, or off camera that we cant enjoy them.  Overall, American Sasquatch is a very difficult film to finish.  The acting and pieced together story makes for a very confusing and boring experience that I can't recommend.  Wild Eye knows that I love them but this one was not for me.  Skip it.  

Lycanimator




Director - Sebastien Godin (DinoGore, Slimoids)
Starring - Cayt Feinics (Naked Cannibal Campers, WrestleMassacre), Joel D. Wynkoop (Clownado, Death-Scort Service), and Briana Wyman (Ouija Mummy, Clown Roulette)
Release Date - 2018
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Release your beast"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Filmmaker Sebastien Godin is one I'm fairly new to.  I befriended him a year or so ago on social media and was impressed by the clever titles of his films.  Movies like Ouija Mummy, DinoGore, and Slimoids really do make your imagination wonder.  Since then I've reviewed several of his films and really enjoyed them.  They are far from perfect but they are highly entertaining which is all you can ask for.  Sometime ago I heard about his Lycanimator film.  I reached out to Seb and he told me that it was getting a release through one of my favorite distribution companies, Wild Eye Releasing.  I couldn't wait for it but then I learned that this initial release was cut down to just 40 minutes.  I decided to hold off on checking out that release until I could get the full release.  Last month Wild Eye released the film under their Raw and Extreme banner in it's uncut form.  I reached out to Wild Eye and they were kind enough to send a copy of the film my way.  Thanks guys!
     The film follows a group of young adults who rent an old house for a weekend getaway.  The house was once owned by a mad scientist who conducted experiments using a strange slime in the basement.  When the group runs out of booze they search the house for more alcohol when the find the strange substance.  One of them drinks it and soon finds himself transforming into a hideous creature.
     I avoided trailers for Lycanimator until I could actually see it so the experience wouldn't be spoiled.  The movie didn't live up to the awesome posters that I had seen for it but it was still very fun.  My biggest complaint about this one is how chaotic the film is.  The editing is very choppy and we move from them to them with very little transitioning.  The movie is fun so don't take it the wrong way but it is very chaotic to follow.  The acting in this one is inconsistent.  Some of the cast, like Cayt Feinics, does a solid job in their performance.  However, some of the other cast members are extremely awkward.  Their dialogue and interactions with other cast members does not feel genuine and the dialogue is very forced.  It made for some extremely awkward scenes that just made the story lose it's impact.  The story for this one combines several elements of classic horror which Godin is a huge fan of.  His inspiration is drawn from classic tales of werewolves, Frankenstein, and mixed with an 80s style of story telling.  You sprinkle it with a dash of EuroTrash lighting and scene set ups and you have Godin's aesthetic.  I really liked what he did with the story and meshing so many classic tales.  However, the film is very choppy bouncing between the actual film and other inserts.  Editing would have made this one so much better.  Finally, the film is a no budget creature feature but they did the best with what resources they had.  The creature was pretty impressive but it does have a little bit of humor built into it.  It is rather funny but I still like the design and how well it fit the film.  The practical effects are rather limited as well but they work for the film.  Overall, Lycanimator has it's fair share of flaws but it is an enjoyable late night horror show.  Fans of no budget horror will definitely appreciate what this film is going for.  I highly recommend checking it out.  

Wednesday, December 23, 2020

Monster Movie



Director(s) - Mark Polonia (Splatter Farm, Return to Splatter Farm) and John Polonia (Church of the Damned, Hellspawn)
Starring - Brian Berry (Werewolf Rising, Splatter Beach), Todd Carpenter (Sharkenstein, Bigfoot vs. Zombies), and Anthony Polonia (Peter Rottentail, Razorteeth)
Release Date - 2008
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Prehistoric terror... at 24 frames per second!"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     The Polonia Brothers, Mark and John, and two of the most prolific filmmakers in the indie horror scene.  Their careers started in 1985 with the film Church of the Damned.  Sadly, in 2008 John passed away.  That didn't stop Mark from continuing his work in film.  In 2008, the year John passed away, the pair worked on a found footage film called Monster Movie.  I had heard very little about this release but it was included as a bonus disc in Camp Motion Picture's release of Splatter Farm.  While I was on a Splatter Farm double Feature I decided it was a good time to check this one out as well.  
     The film follows a group of men who decide to go out into the woods for a little getaway.  What starts out as a trip for smoking, drinking, and fishing, turns strange and deadly when they find their camp destroyed one morning.  Soon they find themselves face to face with a giant creature that is destroying livestock in the area.
     I had stated in other reviews that the films from the Polonia Brother's are hit and miss with me.  Some I absolutely love while others are tough to finish.  Monster Movie is one that was difficult to finish which would explain why I had never heard about it aside from it being a double feature in the Splatter Farm release.  The acting in this one is pretty rough.  In fact, it's easily the worst I have seen to come out of the Polonia camp.  The dialogue is painfully awkward to watch and the characters lack personalities and defining traits that make them stand out.  The found footage style adds another layer of awkward conversation to the film as the cast attempts to capture that family video type vibe.  The story for this one is a lot of dialogue with very little horror.  The film tries very hard to capture that found footage vibe so we get a lot of unimportant conversation and meaningless tasks being performed for the viewer which creates a very dull film.  The horror aspect doesn't appear until the final portion of the film and then it's barely anything to hold your attention.  If anything, the film could have ran for around 20 minutes and even then it would have failed to tell a story.  Finally, if you are looking for a bloodbath like other Polonia releases you will be disappointed.  The film does have a cheesy looking "creature" that is not that impressive and barely on screen.  Overall, Monster Movie could have been another fun and cheesy Polonia release but the film itself feels rushed and unfinished.  This is one I cannot recommend.  Skip it.  

Return to Splatter Farm




Director(s) - Jeff Kirkendall (Halloween Horror Tales, The Green-Eyed Monster) and Mark Polonia (Bigfoot vs. Zombies, HalloweeNight)
Starring - Danielle Donahue (Survival Knife, Muckman), Nico Bryant, and Mel Heflin (Teacher Shortage, Steve: Death Collector)
Release Date - 2020
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Jeremy has returned"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Most of you that have followed my reviews for sometime know that I fucking love Wild Eye Releasing.  I may not enjoy every one of their releases but they are bringing no budget horror films to the masses at a time when most would go unnoticed.  I greatly admire what they are doing and I love getting in their releases for review.  Several months back Wild Eye sent over the exclusive announcement that Mark Polonia was teaming up with Jeff Kirkendall to direct a follow up to Splatter Farm.  I was fucking pumped about this news and couldn't wait until I could check it out.  A few weeks ago I got the follow up in for review and had to make time for it.  Thanks Wild Eye for sending it over.  
     The film follows a young woman who has inherited a family farm.  She decides to take some friends with her while she checks it out and spend a few days drinking.  The locals have nicknamed the property Death Farm and many know about the farms tarnished history.  They chalk it up to a thing of the past but soon that past comes back to haunt them when the murders start up again.  
     I was really looking forward to this one.  The Polonia Brothers are acquired taste and not many horror fans can get into their films.  Honestly, they are hit and miss with me but the ones I like I really like.  It was sad that John is no longer with us to help his brother on this follow up to their 1987 S.O.V. classic but I was still extremely excited to check it out.  Sadly, it just wasn't as fun as the original.  It did have it's moments but it just couldn't pull it together for me.   The acting in this one is my biggest complaint with the film.  If you look through my reviews you will find a good portion of films from first time filmmakers with no budgets or experience.  I'm not a reviewer that is watching no budget movies expecting the same caliber of performances you would see in a multi-million dollar production.  However, sometimes I come across movies where the cast just completley misses their marks.  The dialogue is forced and the interactions are not genuine.  I know several people on the cast and know what they are capable of and this is not it.   The story for this one does serve as a great follow up to the original.  It has been some time since the original film was released, 33 years as of writing this, which is a considerable amount of time for a sequel.  The original borrowed heavily from hixploitation films like Texas Chainsaw Massacre, yet, here we are again with a film that borrows from the franchise.  Texas Chainsaw 3D follows a young girl who returns to her family farm after learning of her adoption.  Adoption is replaced with inheritance here but the story still remains the same.  I'm not knocking the story here because I really enjoyed it.  If the characters were a little more memorable and the acting was better I could really see myself loving this one.  TCM inspired or not, it works for a no budget film.  Finally, the kills in this one are not as fun as the first film.  The first film is a S.O.V. classic with plenty of practical effects and carnage.  This one delivers the body count but the effects and kills are nowhere near as fun as the first film.  They work for the movie but don't up the anti so to speak.  Overall, Return to Splatter Farm has it's moments but the acting just cuts this one short for me.  The story may be very TCM inspired but it works for a sequel to the original film.  It deserves at least one viewing but don't expect to find a movie that will forever change your life.  

Tuesday, December 22, 2020

Splatter Farm




Director(s) - John Polonia (Splatter Beach, Bad Magic), Mark Polonia (Return to Splatter Farm, Land Shark), and Todd Michael Smith (Church of the Damned, Lethal Nightmares)
Starring - Todd Michael Smith, John Polonia, and Mark Polonia 
Release Date - 1987
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "Old McDonald had a farm... Ei Ei ouch"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     I've spent most of my life collecting horror movies.  I'm always on the hunt for something I don't own and use various social media platforms to find titles to add to my collection.  Many years ago I joined the forums at Upcoming Horror Movies where I discovered so many indie and underground horror movies that had slipped through my grasps.  It was here that I was introduced to the Polonia Brothers.  Not long after that I bought the Splatter Farm DVD from Camp Motion Pictures.  I didn't watch it right away and over time it gained dust sitting on my shelves.  Wild Eye recently announced a sequel to this one so I decided it was the perfect time to dig into it before giving the new follow up a spin.  
     The film follows twins who visit their aunt on her farm.  She has a very backward son who she employs as a farm hand.   What they don't know is that he is the result of their aunt being raped by her brother and he's secretly killing people before cutting up the bodies and hiding them around the farm.
     I always get excited to dive into a no-budget horror flick I had never seen before.  I had heard a lot of things about Splatter Farm but I was hesitante to check it out after August Underground let me down like it did.  However, I found myself liking Splatter Farm even though it was poorly put together.  It's a bad movie but it does have charm.  The acting in this one is some of the most inexperienced I've seen.  Considering the cast's age and lack of experience at this point makes you take these scenes with a grain of salt but a lot of the scenes is a bit rough to watch.  No one can question the cast's devotion to the film but they were clearly inexperienced.  The story for this one is fun and is definitely inspired by hixploitation classics like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Deranged.  The inbred killer that butchers people in his barn before hiding their parts throughout the farm is fun and works in this S.O.V. classic.  It may not be original but it's messy and fun.  With that being said, I don't see myself revisiting this one any time soon unless I'm heavily drinking.  Finally, this is a bloody one.  We get some pretty fun kills that uses various methods and camera tricks along with some practical effects.  Honestly, the practical effects really did impress me and the film lives up to it's name.  Sadly, they won't stick with you but they are still fun to watch.  Overall, Splatter Farm is not for those looking for a polished and well put together horror flick.  However, if you want a bloody mess of a horror flick made by young filmmakers looking to make their mark on horror history then this one is for you.  



Game of Thrones: Season Seven




Creator(s) - David Benioff (Troy, Stay) and D.B. Weiss (It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia)
Starring - Hannah Murray (Charlie Says, Dark Shadows), Carice van Houten (Black Death, Repo Men), and Kristofer Hivju (The Witcher, The Thing)
Release Date - 2007
Genre - Fantasy/Action
Tagline - "The end begins"
Format - 4K Ultra HD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Here we are.  When I started watching this series and talking about it among friends I was told that if I loved the northern story and the white walker angle then I would absolutely love season seven.  I was looking forward to this season after others told me about it but I was weary after watching the last season.  As I stated in my review for the previous season, it wasn't a bad season but it was a downward spiral from the three season's before it.  
     This seasons follows the Mother of Dragons as she makes her way to Dragonstone with her army and begins negotiations with Jon Snow who is now king of the north.  She wants him to bend the knee but he refuses at first in hopes of convincing her to put her quest for the 7 Kingdoms aside to focus on the army of the dead in the north.  Over time she agrees and the two set out to convince Cersi to alliance with them until the army of the dead is defeated. Cersi agrees but she has another play to make behind their backs.
     This season did have the political side that I don't really care for but it did dive deeper into the northern story with much more revealed and several surprises along the way.  Honestly, I think this is my favorite season yet and I can't wait to dive into the final season.  The acting in this one is consistent with the previous seasons.  The cast is absolutely amazing and the viewer is given so many memorable characters.  It seems like each episode has me changing my mind up over who is my favorite character.  The story for this one is still very loyal to the GoT universe while diving so much deeper into the white walker lore.  We get some much needed action with the army of the dead and their ever expanding story draws me in.  With that being said, the political drama is still there but it's not as dominate as the previous season.  We also get some more character story development as well that brings some great revelations to the viewer.  Finally, the film is full of carnage and action.  The battle with the dead was fantastic.  This season is not as bloody as previous seasons but we do get some great visual effects that put past seasons to shame.  Overall, Season seven is my favorite season so far and well worth the wait.  I hope season eight can hit this hard!