Thursday, December 17, 2015

Manos: The Hands of Fate

Director - Harold P. Warren
Starring - Tom Neyman (Manos Returns), John Reynolds (Hotel Torgo), and Diane Adelson (Hotel Torgo)
Release Date - 1966
Genre - Horror
Tagline - "It's shocking! It's beyond your imagination"
Format - BluRay (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):
     Dedicated horror fans love a bad movie.  Hell, some strive to watch all the horror flicks that have earned the "so bad it's good" reputation and the films that are labeled the "worst film ever."  I have to admit that I am one of these idiots.  When someone says that a movie is the worst that they have seen then I have to see it to see just how right they are.  Everyone knows that Troll 2 is the reigning king as the worst film ever made but Silent Night Deadly Night 2 and Sleepaway Camp  IV: The Survivor is not far behind.  Another film that I heard people complain about is the 1966 horror flick Manos: The Hands of Fate.  I saw the film for sale several times at FYE and other video stores for just a few dollars but I always found something else that I wanted and skipped over it.  That was until Synapse released the film on blu.  I reached out to them and they were kind enough to send a copy my way to check out.  Thanks guys!
     The film follows a small family out for a drive when they become lost and find themselves driving down a dirt road with darkness approaching.  They stop by the first place they come across which is a home that is maintained by Torgo while his master is away.  His master has been dead for sometime now but Torgo believes that he will return with his hellhounds one day and believes he is a powerful being that will love the mother of the group.  Their presence awakens the master, Manos, and he sets out to unleash hell on Torgo and the family while his wives fight each other over his attention.

      What makes a bad movie?  Does it have bad acting, a weak story, and bad practical effects?  What exactly turns people off to a movie.  The movie has to make no effort in order for me to deem it bad.  The acting has to be horrible to the point it is almost unwatchable.  The story has to be so weak and poorly written that the story is impossible to follow, and the kills have to be so bad that you want to punch your t.v.  Manos: The Hands of Fate just happens to fail in all those categories and unlike SNDN2 and Troll 2, it is not so bad it's good.  The acting in this one is horrible.  The entire cast forgot that they were supposed to act when saying their dialogue.  In stead, they stand around like cardboard cutouts spitting out their lines.  With that being said, John Reynolds who played Torgo was actually pretty entertaining.  His character was unrealistic and fun in a Troma sort of way.  His character did not fit in the film at all.  I laughed when he was first introduced but his presence is very out of place.  The story for this one is is similar to so many others during the Satanic cult craze of the late 60s and early 70s that played on religious fears.  Unlike those films, it is unable to spin a story worth a damn.  The story starts out with three ordinary characters that are flat as hell trying to find their way home before getting lost.  They then awaken a dead man with powers and his bride.  Who is he and why does he have powers?  Also, why are brides fighting?  The film raises more questions than it has answers.  Finally, those of you looking for some 60s blood and gore will be very upset because the film lacks them both.  In fact, the film is pretty dry in that respects.  Overall, Manos: The Hands of Fate is easily one of the worst films I have been unfortunate to site through.  Synapse has done an amazing job restoring the film and putting together some special features but the film is undeserving.  I can not and will not recommend this shit pile!

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