Thursday, November 3, 2016

Microwave Massacre

Director - Wayne Berwick (The Naked Monster)
Starring - Jackie Vernon (Kolchak: The Night Stalker, Frosty's Winter Wonderland), Loren Schein, and Al Troupe (Feast, L.A. Heat)
Release Date - 1983
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "They came for find out they were it"
Format - Bluray (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):
When I was in middle school I started collecting hardcore.  Anytime I could visit a flea market, yard sale, or store I would immediately hit the movie section.  Hell, I still do that but for a different format.  Back when I was hunting for VHS there was several tapes I really wanted.  Goremet, Zombie Chef from Hell, Frankenhooker with the light up box, Abomination, and Microwave Massacre were the that that I remember actively searching for.  I found these films at several horror cons but they were actually DVD boots and not the real VHS.  I gave up looking for them when I gave up collecting VHS but recently got excited again when Arrow announced that they would be releasing Microwave Massacre film on blu.  I reached out to MVD, who was releasing the film in the U.S., and they were kind enough to send a copy my way.  Thanks guys!
The film follows blue collar construction worker Donald (Vernon) who misses his lunch before his wife tried spicing things up with her new industrial microwave.   She is making exotic dishes that he is not too fond of.  He misses his old lunches which usually consisted of some sort of deli meat and bread but his wife refuses to listen to him.  One day after a hard day at work she screws up one of her outrages meals and then verbally abuses Donald.  He had a little too much to drink and kills her in a fit of rage.  He awakens the next morning as if nothing had happened but with a new dish for lunch.  He slowly remembers what happened and how he turned part of his wife into his new meal.   That sparks a killing spree where he would lure women back to his place where he fucks them and then kills them for his food source where he prepares them in his wife's microwave.
     I knew Microwave Massacre would be fun.  Hell, how could a cannibal flick based around a microwave not be fun?  I knew the film would be cheesy and campy but I had no idea I would like it as much as I did.  The acting in this one is not that great.  It was fair but that was about it.  Vernon was great as Donald and gave the film a lot of personalty but the remainder of the film's cast and characters did not fit with Donald's character.  His was fun and over the top while the rest of the characters were flat and very one dimensional.  The cast is solid for the most part but they do not get the option to show off their skills the same as Vernon.  The story for this one is fun but reminds me a lot of the other suburban cannibal flicks.  Considering the release date of this one I can only assume that it is one of the firsts to inspire others like it including Auntie Lee's Meat Pies and Rabid Grannies.  The story is fun but does have a hard time filling in the film's running time.  Some of the scenes are rather boring and could have been cut to make the film flow a lot better.  Finally, the film has a few deaths that are mostly Donald choking out his female victims.  There is a few weak dismemberment scenes that use every trick in the book.  Back in the 40s this would have been fun but now, and considering the type of film it is, it does not work that well.  Overall, Microwave Massacre is a film that is far from perfect but has that late night viewing charm.  This is the type of movie that looks great on blu from Arrow but would have been just as enjoyable if you watched it on VHS.  If you want cheese with your horror then this is one you may want to check out.

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