The Italian Zombie Movie: The Grindhouse Cut

Director - Thomas Berdinski (The Giant Rubber Monster Movie: Sascratch Versus Afrodesious)
Starring - Jeffrey S. Bromley (The Giant Rubber Monster Movie: Sascratch Versus Afrodesious), Laurie Beckerman (Cow Tippers from Outer Space), and LaShelle Mikesell (Cow Tippers From Outer Space)
Release Date - 2010
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "The dead are back...for a snack" and "No guts, No gory"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     Before I go any further I want to thank Thomas Berdinski for sending me a DVD to review, as well as, the little gifts with it.  I really do appreciate it.  I found the film, Italian Zombie Movie, one day while checking my Facebook page.  Dustin Mills, a director whose name I seem to be typing a lot as of late, posted that he was sick of the sad state the zombie sub-genre is in at the moment.  We started talking about films like Zombi, Let Sleeping Corpses Lie, and The Blind Dead series.  He mentioned this movie and peeked my curiosity.  I found the Facebook page and sent it a message asking how I could get a copy of the film for review.  Berdinski got my address and sent me a copy of the film but it was just not any edition of the film.  He sent me the grindhouse cut of his flick.  His original film is split into two separate films, however, this new cut had both segments together making one solid film running around 3 hours.
     Before I continue I want to say that trying to explain the storyline to this film is extremely difficult to do even though I am sitting here completely and utterly sober.  The movie is about a military compound where U.S. Troops were subjected to tests performed by a scientist.  The scientist sold his soul in order to create a serum that will make the U.S. Army unstoppable.  What he got in return was a chemical, antitoxin, that brings the dead back to life.  The government tried to cover it up but the test subjects refuse to remain buried.  This is where a one eyed commando (not a penis joke) comes in to play.  His brother, a man in a luchadore mask, was killed and the answers to his mysterious death can be found in that very compound.  Along the way he crosses paths with two militia men, a succubus, a girl with telekinetic powers, his brother's talking head, an undead feminist with control of the undead, and a shitload of zombies!!!
     This movie was released, in one form or another, back in 2010 and I feel like the biggest piece of shit for not knowing this movie existed.  This movie is a fun throwback to classic zombie films that were made way before 28 Days Later and any other film with fast paced zombies and apocalyptic world settings.  Fans of Italian and Spanish zombie films from the 70s will love this one.  The movie has a lot of praise points, as well as, a few low points that prevented this one from being spectacular.  The acting is hit and miss and when I mean hit and miss I truly mean that.  Most of the cast did a great job in their role.  You can tell that most are amateurs but talent can still be seen.  However, a few did not fit well with the film and made some scenes difficult to follow.  If those scenes were possibly cut in a different manner it would have saved them making the movie even more entertaining.  The story is nothing original but is a breathe of fresh air among the bullshit of cheap ass "Wal-Mart" horror flicks that can be found in abundance at Wal-Mart and other major retail chains.  Finally, we get some great special effects and gore.  I loved how the zombies looked in this one and though the special effects are not as great as the films they inspire to be they are still amazing.  Overall, this is a giant step in the right direction for modern zombie flicks.  However, I personally do not see that happening because people love buying shitty movies in bulk.  Please grab this one!