Shark Exorcist (2015)

Shark Exorcist (2015)
d:  Donald Farmer
s:  Angela Kerecz, Bobby Kerecz, James Balsamo, Roni Jonah, Christy Moritz, Channing Dodson, Lexi Nimmo, Julia Contrenchis 
format:  Personal Collection NTSC:  Region 1
tagline:  Satan Has Jaws

(out of 5)

     As my friend Dustin Mills once pointed out my tolerance for crap is pretty high.  I love bad movies, I love them to the hilt, but some movies are just not on the "so bad it's good" list.  Here is one of the few cheap shark movies I was barely able to get through.  Which really sucks because I was really wanting a shark exorcist movie to be a rewatcher like Ghost Shark which is one of my favorites.  But when your fx make movies like Sharkansas Women's Prison Massacre and Sharktopus look like something from Guillermo Del Toro then you know as a viewer you've hit the bottom of the barrel.  My kids play this game called Feeding Frenzy, the shark fx kind of reminded me of that.  I sometimes wonder if the moviemakers care at all, whatever's cheap and easy which sometimes can be innovative especially for indie filmmaking but definitely not here. 

     The deaths were pretty much off screen and when they were on screen there is absolutely nothing to write home about.  Hint:  when shooting a person upside down make sure your blood runs with gravity over the forehead.  There was focus on a leg at one point after an attack with some red water around it.  Not sure if there was supposed to be a bite taken out of the leg but I can assure you I have made better Halloween fx using Wal-Mart fx boxes.  Of course you can say this is true of a lot of the shark movies out there because yes the fx are bad but I guess when everything is so bad and there is no gore really to speak of at all the cheapness backfires, at least it definitely does for me.

     The actors, well no one shined.  Then again most of these style films have great acting.  Roni Jonah was as good as it got, the rest flamed out big time and once again unlike other bad movies the combination of everything else just didn't make it.  At least with films like Sharknado you had washed up actors to laugh at.

     What's so bad it's good is definitely subjective from person to person but I love bad movies and I love independent films and myself have been on sets, etc.  It takes hard word to make movies, but if the hard work is this I'll pass.  I try and find something redeeming about every movie I watch.  Sometimes it just can't be done.  In my own personal rating system this movie would get a dud.  I'm sure it was fun to shoot but my goodness find a better cgi guy, get some full shark attack scenes and just plain get better fx.  I can't believe I bought this, well done you got my money.