Slice

Director - Terence Muncy (Bikini Muncy)
Starring - Brittany Jessee, Tara Farsnworth, and Brianna Cadwell
Release Date - 2012
Genre - Horror
Format - DVD (Personal  Collection) (Screener)

Rating (out of 5):

     I get asked to review horror flicks all the time.  Honestly, it is one of the greatest feelings in the world knowing that someone wants me to check out their hard work.  This has granted me several amazing opportunities over the years when my reviews were quoted on the DVD/blu cover or seeing my quotes on the poster for theatrical releases.  The downside to that is people ask me to check out their work and I just don't like it.  I like some pretty bad movies but some are just too bad for me to like.  A few days ago director Sean Donohue reached out to me to review two films that he will be distributing through his Gatorblade label.  The two films, Slice and Bikini Monsters, arrived at my doorstep just a few days later.  I tossed in Slice first and it was different for sure.  Thanks Sean for letting me check this one out.  

     The film follows a group of sexy women who dress up in slutty Halloween costumes and attend a party for some booze action.  Most of the girls are under the impression that there will be more people at the party but they soon learn that it is a small get together of women.  That does not stop them from getting liquored up and having a good time at the old, abandoned home that once belonged to one of the women.  A drunken night of female debauchery soon turns bloody when a masked man shows up and starts killing these beautiful women in the most gruesome ways imaginable.  Soon, the surviving ladies learn the masked maniacs true identity and his connection to one of the women.

     I have seen thousands upon thousands of horror films over the years and reviewed several hundred since joining Horror Society so I have learned a thing or two about figuring out a film before seeing it.  Slice looked like a good, ol' fashioned slasher flick in the lines of the classic late 70s and early 80s slashers that I grew up on.  However, Slice is a different beast altogether and not one I would actually call good.  The acting in this one is very rough and almost laughable.  The cast just spit out their dialogue with no conviction.  They show no emotion and just say their lines in the same manner one would talk to a relative on the phone that just can't get the hint that you don't want to talk to them.  You say what you have to say in a dry, bland manner and hope they pick up on your tone.  That was the acting in this one.  With all that being said, these girls are fucking hot.  When I say hot I don't mean hot like that girl you went to high school with and would tug on your bird in your bedroom before bed.  These women are porn star hot.  The story for this one is Texas Chainsaw Massacre meets the Scream twist.  We get a little less than a dozen super sexy women in a house full or booze while a masked man kills, mutilates, and so forth their bodies before turning incestuous.  We then get the Scream "I was part of the killing" twist that honestly caught me off guard but after the film was done it completely made sense.  I liked that.  Sadly, the execution of the story was all off.  The film was painfully slow and had zero character buildup.  The only thing it really had going for it was the fact that the girls were hot.  Had I mentioned that before?  Finally, the film does have several in screen kills and tons of gore but the kills were pretty weak and the gore was done in almost a comical way which really took away from the overall kill.  The practical effects were solid but the execution of the kills were all wrong.  Overall, Slice is a film that has it all; hot babes, blood, and a good story.  However, it was unable to make anything watchable out of that combination.  The film does deserve a watch but make sure you have the tissue and lotion ready.