Dear God No!

Director - James Bickert (Dumpster Baby, Frankenstein Created Bikers)
Starring - Jett Bryant (Frankenstein Created Bikers), Madeline Brumby (Tales from Morningview Cemetery), and Paul McComiskey (Frankenstein Created Bikers)
Release Date - 2011
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "When the blood begins to flow.... who will be left to scream"
Format - DVD (Personal Collection)

Rating (out of 5):

     Sometime last year I came across a trailer for Dear God No! and absolutely loved it.  I was pissed that I had never heard about it before.  I found it on amazon.com for pre-order and that is exactly what I did. When I finally got it in the mail I watched it at least 4 or 5 times that week.  That month and the months that followed it is hard to count how many times I actually watched it.  I watched it so much that I thought it would be unfair to actually review it.  Once, I was brought on to write for Horror Society I lost all the spare time I had before to watch the film and started watching screeners that directors had sent me.  However, on my vacation I had plenty of time to watch this movie and decided it was time to give this one an overdue review. 

     The film follows a 1% outlaw biker gang known as The Impalers led by the bloodthirsty Jett (Bryant).  Jett hates to be sober but not as much as he hates not killing.  The group set out on a drug-fueled rampage that leads them to a scientist and his awkwardly hot daughter. The doctor seems to be studying a bigfoot like creature that he believes is actually a mutant instead of the missing link.  He invites a colleague and his pregnant wife over unaware that The Impalers were following them.  The Impalers force themselves inside the home where rape and murder follow until it is revealed that the scientist has ties to the Nazi party and bigfoot arrives to crash the party bringing blood and gore with him!
     This is one of the few films that will leave you literally saying "what the fuck did I just see."  I have seen this movie at least twenty times and I have yet to build a tolerance to the insanity that is captured on this film.  This movie is over the top and insane and that is what I love about it.  What else could you call a movie with Nazis, bikers, and bigfoot?  In regards to the acting, you have to take the good with the bad.  Those portraying The Impalers did a great job and I loved seeing them on camera.  However, the rest of the cast are hard to watch and actually brings down the film.  The story is completely off the wall and I fucking love it.  It is so absurd that it is brilliant.  Those looking for in depth story writing and a heart warming story will need to look somewhere else.  The point of this story is to blow your mind and mine is blown.  The film, if you haven't noticed, it a love letter to 70's exploitation and trash films.  Finally, this film is filled with crazy on screen deaths and very decent special effects.  Sure, they are not Tom Savini great effects but they are damn good indie film special effects.  Most of the deaths are brutal and just as crazy as the plot to this film.  Those that are sick and perverse will love it just like I did.  Overall, this is a movie that should be watched.  If you have yet to see it then watch it...or kill yourself.  There is no in between.  I highly, and I mean highly, recommend it!