Lords of Salem (A Review For People Who Can't Understand Hallucinations)

 

Lords of Salem (2013)
directed by :  Rob Zombie
starring:  Sheri Moon Zombie, Dee Wallace, Ken Foree, Bruce Davidson, Patricia Quinn, Maria Alonso, Meg Foster, Jeff Phillips, Judy Geeson, Sid Haig, Michael Berryman, Richard Fancy
Format:  PAL (2) Private Collection

    Lords of Salem received many bad reviews and online posts upon it's arrival to the select theatres and reviewers everywhere.  Perhaps this is why director Rob Zombie is choosing at the moment to not do horror films anymore.  Every movie he's made so far has received a large backlash of negativity with the possible exception of Devil's Rejects.  To my own admission I hated his version of Halloween that being said I am however a superfan of the Superbeast aka Robert Wolfgang Zombie.  House of 1,000

Corpses was no great flick but very enjoyable for me anyway as it was Rob's fledgling attempt at directing with both it's ups and downs.  Then came Devil's Rejects which in my opinion was leagues more talented cinematically, cgi blood notwithstanding.  I thought he would never make a film as great as Rejects.  I was wrong.  I cannot see the hate this film has produced.  Sure it's a bit arty, but the shots and camera work truly show that Zombie knows his medium.  Starring several of Zombie's regulars including Ken Foree and his own wife Sheri Moon Zombie who also has received an onslaught of negative feedback.  I mean Sheri is my no means an Audry Hepburn but she is also by no means bad in any way shape or form given the thousands of examples I've seen in my lifetime.  People have said she's the same character in every film.  Yeah no, not at all she played a hyper active psycho killer in one, a red neck half ass mother in another, and in this a radio personality with her fair share of emotional problems.  I don't know maybe it's the laugh or the fact that she's Zombie's wife and people think there's something wrong with that but I just don't see her as a "bad" actress.
      As I said this film got a limited release and before seeing it I was most upset by this since I couldn't see it on the big screen.  Then I saw it and figured out why within the first ten minutes.  It's nasty right down to licking a newborn baby's bloody head after birth and priests with their penises hanging out.  The ominous shots in this movie especially towards the end are in my opinion spectacular.  These hallucinogenic scenes which are seen throughout the film are what threw a lot of the haters out I'm sure. 

People for whatever reason don't either have the imagination or creative intelligence to understand that there are no rules during hallucinations brought on especially by possession. 
    The movie follows Heidi Hawthorne a popular radio personality along with Herman Jackson (Ken Foree) and Herman Salvador (Jeff Phillips) who do a show on the radio featuring very unique guests including Francis Matthias (Bruce Davison) who wrote a book about the Salem Witch trials.  While Francis is on the air Heidi plays a mysterious record sent to her by a group only known as, "The Lords".  This sinister little number by Zombie's own guitarist John 5 and Griffin Boice nails the musical aspect of the film.  It could not have been better written in my mind.  Every time the song is played on a record player the images in Heidi's mind begin and she sees the witches of Salem performing a ritual to bring about the birth of satan's child. 
     Margret Morgan the leader of the coven of witches is played by Meg Foster a terrifying character to say the very least.  Every time she hit the screen all I saw was the very definition of what a real evil witch would look and act like.  Heidi lives in a apartment building where three of the descendants of these witches live. 

One of whom is none other than Dee Wallace one of my favorite actresses of all time. These ladies go to great lengths to make sure Heidi is left alone to fulfill her tragic satanic destiny.  This whole film is very dark and some would say blasphemous, but as a Christian myself my only word for that is "duh" I mean it's about evil witches trying to end the world by bringing about the birth of satan's child.  Rob Zombie is one of the most artistically creative horror icons on the planet and this is thus far his cinematic masterpiece.  If you want a straight up Devil's Rejects style film then don't watch Lords of Salem you will hate it but I tell people all the time who hate shakey cameras to stop watching found footage films and they never listen.  Great movie.