Camp Blood First Slaughter

CAMP BLOOD FIRST SLAUGHTER
Writer/Director:Mark Polonia
Starring:Does it really matter?  You're not going to see these faces again.
Availability:DVD release from MVD Entertainment available at most online retailers
Rating:

    So, I feel I should preface this review by letting you all know that I apologize for not being more productive with my reviews lately.  Life has been far too surreal for me to now how to approach anything right now.  That being said, I also must express my disappointment that this is going to end up being my second negative review in a row.  However, unlike Daddy's Little Girl, which was an ambitious film that fell under the weight of its own ideas, this one here has no ideas, and that's the sort of thing I just can't deal with.

    Before requesting this movie to review, I picked up Brad Syke's original Camp Blood trilogy.  Over the years, I read so many reviews talking about how awful they were, but I also knew they had their fans.  Plus, I'm a sucker for shot on video schlock, so I figured what the hell?  Well, as it turns out, I enjoyed these flicks quite a bit.  They weren't entirely original, but they also weren't just basic stalk and slash flicks either.  Okay, for the most part they were, but Sykes was smart enough to throw some twists and turns along the way.  Plus, the sequels all did something different with the concept, which was refreshing.  They weren't great films, but they were fun.

    Naturally, being a fan of Mark Polonia, I was definitely intrigued by what he would bring to the table for the next Camp Blood installment.  His previous flick Empire of the Apes was pretty bad, but it was at least somewhat ambitious, and was a fun beer and pizza night movie.  This one was just flat, bland, and unimaginative.  It fails as a slasher movie, and I'm starting to wonder if John Polonia was the real genius out of the two brothers.  Okay, genius is stretching it.  However, the movies that the Polonia brothers did together are bizarre, creative, demented little pieces of outsider cinema.  The stuff that Mark has done since John's death has had none of that.  The personality is gone.

    Camp Blood First Slaughter tries to tie itself to the previous three films.  We've still got a killer in a clown mask.  We still have the stock slasher characters that exist only to be killed off.  We have a lame attempt at a twist ending, which Brad handled much better.  The kills are so boring, and there are some instances of awful CGI gore.  I understand CGI makes sense economically, but it still looks like shit if it's not done well.  There's practical gore here, too, but it doesn't fare much better.  Brad's films may be rough around the edges and cheap to the extreme, but they were fun.  They had some good bloodshed, and even a decent amount of nudity.  This is also something that is sadly lacking here.

    I do not recommend this film, even if you are a fan of the previous films.  It's not fun.  There's no personality to it.  I'm not angry at myself for watching it, but I also feel I could have spend those 70 minutes doing something more productive.  David Sterling is an interesting dude, and I've quite enjoyed a lot of the movies he's produced.  This one is pretty much dead on arrival, though.  I hate to say it, but I think I may have to give up on Mark Polonia after this.  It just feels like he's going through the motions.  Stick with the original trilogy, and you will thank me later.

    Until next time, my fellow freaks and weirdos...