Rockula

Director - Luca Bercovici (The Granny)
Starring - Dean Cameron (Men at Work), Thomas Dolby (Howard the Duck), and Tawny Fere (Night Children)
Release Date - 1990
Genre - Horror/Comedy
Tagline - "He's a vampire that hasn't scored in 400 years.  Tonight's the night"

Rating (out of 5):

     I love movies from the 80's like I have stated many times throughout my reviews.  I have a soft spot for anything cheesy and if it involves vampires then I'm all for it.  I prefer zombies and slashers now but when I was a child I loved campy vampire flicks like My Best Friend is a Vampire and Vamp.  So one night while looking at a site that specializes in movies that have not yet been released on dvd I ran across this little flick.  I have to see cheesy 80's flicks, especially one that has an Elvis vampire impersonator on the cover. I know this film was made in 1990 but that year still had many of the 80's trends and style that made actual 80's movies worth watching

     This little gem follows a 400 year old vampire that is cursed to watch the one he loves die every 20 or so years.  In his youth he fell in love with a woman but she is murdered by a ham bone wielding pirate with a peg leg.  Because he sat by ideally and did nothing he is cursed to let this cycle repeat itself.  It is up to him to stop the pirate from murdering her in order to break the curse and finally get laid after waiting 400.  

    Like so many films I've watched before, I really wanted to like this cheesy flick.  This movie just did not offer anything different and nothing really stood out.  What I liked about it was the story.  It was very original and played well with the 80's feel of the flick.  Though the movie was made in 90 it still has that great 80's vibe.  I also really liked the characters.  They are very outlandish and loveable like characters you would find in Revenge of the Nerds.  The acting is pretty decent by a cast consisting of members that really did not go on and do bigger and better things.  What I did not like about the film is they did not really do anything with the story.  They built up the big bad curse and then nothing happened and no climax took place.  There was a really horrible fight scene the vampire and pirate but it was utterly pointless.  Overall, this movie had some great potential but was unable to pull it off.  The production company made a mediocre film that will probably die off into obscurity.  It was entertaining, for the most part, for the first viewing but has no replay value at all.  Check it out on Netflix and then forget about it.